


Clarke's the Man!

by Reindrops



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Alternate Universe - She's the Man Fusion, Alternate Universe - Sports, Bellamy Blake & Clarke Griffin are Roommates, Deception, F/M, Football | Soccer, Friends to Lovers, High School, Inspired by She's the Man (2006), Minor Finn Collins/Raven Reyes, Pretending to be a man, Roommates, mino Finn Collins/Echo, minor clarke griffin/roan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-25
Updated: 2018-07-29
Packaged: 2019-04-07 18:15:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 43,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14086740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reindrops/pseuds/Reindrops
Summary: Clarke Griffin is in a real jam. Complications threaten her scheme to pose as her cousin, Finn Collins, and take his place at a new boarding school. She falls in love with her handsome roommate, Bellamy Blake, who loves beautiful Raven, who has fallen for Clarke as Finn!  The Bellarke remake of She’s the Man.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've been toying around with this idea for forever it seems like. I finally sat down and started writing. I'm not sure if this is an AU people would be interested in reading as I can't say I've seen many versions of this done before. If I get enough people that are interested in seeing more, I shall continue the story!

There were a lot of things Clarke was expecting when she stepped onto the field. It was supposed to be the first day of practice, and as the captain of the girl’s team, Clarke was expecting to help the new girls on the team find their groove and make them feel like part of the team. She expected being underestimated as she had a smaller, stockier frame than some of the other girls. She expected being given a hard time because her long time boyfriend, Roan, was the captain of the boy’s team, their goalie.

Clarke Griffin had been voted captain for two very important reasons. One she was a good soccer player. Two, she was a solutions kind of girl. She thought of all the possible scenarios that could happen and thought of ways they could all be resolved. It had worked out for her this long. Her teammates trusted her to make the hard decisions. 

Of all the issues Clarke had thought of, the one she didn’t think of was her soccer team being cut. There had been a notice on the locker room door, but she thought it had been a stupid prank done by the boy’s team. She’d ripped it down, threw it in the trash, and changed into her practice attire without a second thought. 

Now, Clarke stood looking out at the field as the boys were now practicing and taking up the whole field rather than the half they were usually designated to. Looking around, she found the boys’ head coach watching the girls from across the field, a smirk on his lips.

Turning briefly back to her teammates, she said, “I’ll be right back.” Then she hurried across the field, not even bothering to go around the boys as they practiced. She just trooped right through them, two of her teammates, Fox and Monroe, close behind her for support.

“Ladies, you’re disturbing my practice,” Coach Shumway told them, not even bothering to look at them as he surveyed his own team.

“What’s this I hear about the girls team being cut?” Clarke asked angrily. 

Coach Shumway shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. “From what I hear, the school board is making cuts to programs around the school. They make more money off of fans coming to watch the boys team than they do the girls team. I also heard not enough girls signed up. That might be problem number one.”

Shumway was a sexist pig, Clarke decided, and she knew it would do no good to keep talking to him about that. He took pleasure in the fact that they couldn’t practice anymore. Clarke had gotten the feeling that he had always felt threatened by how good the girl’s team actually was. 

“We’ll scrimmage for it,” Clarke offered. “If the girl’s win, you have to include the girls on your team.”

The laughing fit Shumway had shouldn’t have surprised her, but it did. She hadn’t expected him to act so childishly. If he was so confident in his boys’ abilities, this should be a no brainer. Instead of answering her, Shumway yelled out for Roan.

Clarke wanted to smirk. He was calling for her boyfriend. Roan was always telling her how good she was and how most of the girls were better than a lot of the boys on his team. He’d been working with her all summer to get her ready for the school year. He’d back her up on this.It was Clarke’s turn to smirk at Shumway.

Roan hurried up their little huddle, a couple of his friends trailing behind him, curious as to what the girls would want. “What’s up, Coach?” he asked as he joined them.

“Clarke here wants to know if she and the girls can be on our team,” Shumway informed him with a knowing smile that Clarke wanted to slap off of his face.

Roan glanced at her with a confused look on his face and asked, “Wait, babe, are you serious?” 

“The girl’s team was cut,” Clarke explained. When Roan didn’t say anything, she frowned as she continued, “You’ve said yourself some of the girls are better than half the guys on your team!” 

“Excuse me?” exclaimed one of Roan’s friends behind him, looking genuinely hurt by this remark. Was it really so hard for them to see what was written on the wall?

“Roan, what’s she talking about?” the other friend asked.

Roan rushed forward and started trying to shuffle Clarke, Fox, and Monroe away from prying ears. “Clarke, you can’t be serious. You can’t play for us. Let it go.” The fact that he said it so casually, as if soccer was as important to her as it was to him, made her blood boil. How dare he act like this wasn’t a big deal, as if her team’s futures weren’t on the line.

Yanking herself out of Roan’s grasp, she narrowed his eyes at him, “You’re so two-faced.” Turning to Shumway, she yelled, “How are the college scouts supposed to recruit us if we’re not playing?”

“You should have thought of that before now,” was all he replied.

“We’re not asking for any special treatment. Just give us a chance,” Clarke pleaded, walking back towards the coach, looking between Roan and Shumway.

“Girls will play for us when pigs fly,” Shumway told her.

Roan cringed. He clearly didn’t necessarily agree with his coach, but he also wasn’t budging on the topic, either. Clarke had never been more disappointed in him. “You can’t be on the team. End of conversation, babe,” he told her.

Shaking her head, Clarke took a step forward to spit out, “End of relationship.” With that, she turned on her heels and stormed off the field, ignoring the taunts from the guys behind her. 

“Come on!” Roan called after her, hurrying towards her, “Don’t be like this. You have to understand!”

Clarke wanted to hit him upside the head, “What I understand is you’re throwing away a two year relationship because you’re a sexist dick.”It hurt knowing she didn’t see this about him until now. How could she have been so blind? 

Shumway blew his whistle, calling the teams to get back to practice. Clarke gestured towards the field and walked back up towards the school without looking back. She wouldn’t give Roan that satisfaction.

She found her team sitting in the locker room, and she did not enjoy breaking the news to them. They’d worked just as hard as the guys. It wasn’t fair their team had been cut. This was their senior year, and most of them had been hoping for soccer scholarships. Now they had nothing.

They were out of luck. No other options other than to go home. So after packing up their lockers, they did. School didn’t start for another two weeks, and Polis had their opening soccer match with Arkadia Academy, one of the best schools in the state to start off the school year. It was usually Clarke’s favorite match of the year. 

With two weeks of time on her hands, Clarke wasn’t sure what she was going to do. No boyfriend and no soccer to keep her busy would be an adjustment. She’d been playing soccer since she could walk, and her and Roan had been together for a couple of years. It would be a weird adjustment.

“Want to come over to my place, and we can all mope around together?” Monroe asked as they left the school and started down the street.

“I’m down,” Fox agreed.

Shaking her head, Clarke replied, “Can’t.My cousin’s in town, and I need to hang out with him.” He was smart and funny; he’d be able to make Clarke laugh and momentarily forget about her woes.

“Which cousin?” Fox asked.

“Finn,” Clarke supplied as she shifted her bag from one shoulder to the other.

“You mean the cousin you look scarily alike?” Monroe asked.

Clarke frowned, “I don’t know why you guys always say that. Finn and I don’t look that alike. I don’t see it.”

“Please, you two could be twins if he was blonde and had a mole on his face like yours,” Fox teased, bumping her with her hip.

“Are you saying my boobs and awesome butt don’t give me away?” Clarke joked, bumping Monroe in turn.

“Your breasts are one of the only things that gives you away,” Monroe answered with a smirk. “But Finn has a nice butt, too, so that’s not really in your favor.”

“Gee, thanks,” Clarke grumbled.

“Tell him and your mom we said hi,” Fox said as they got to the next intersection and went their separate ways. 

Clarke and Finn had grown up as distant cousins at best. His mom and Clarke’s dad were siblings. They hadn’t been close growing up, and only reconnected at her father’s funeral a couple years ago. Clarke’s father had married into money and Jake’s sister married a guy from the wrong side of the tracks. The two families just hadn’t meshed well.

Clarke and Finn had grown closer after the funeral, becoming friends. Finn was actually staying with Clarke and her family over the week. He was going to be leaving back to Arkadia in a couple of weeks just in time for the start of his new school, and Clarke wanted to make sure the two of them had time to spend together before he left.

The house phone was ringing as Clarke entered the house, which was odd. No one ever called the landline. That’s what cellphones were for. She wasn’t even sure why they had a landline still set up, but her Mom insisted. Probably for instances such as this.

“I’ll get it!” She called as she hurried into the office and grabbed the phone expecting the call to be about something important. “Hello?”

“Finn?” asked the voice on the phone. The voice belonged to a woman and was vaguely familiar, though Clarke couldn’t place it at the moment.

“Uh, no, This is Clarke, who is this?” she replied.

“Oh, right. Clarke. I’m Finn’s girlfriend, and I’ve been trying to reach him all day,” the girl answered. Clarke vaguely remembered Finn mentioning a girlfriend named Echo.

“I’m not sure where he is at the moment. Have you tried his cellphone?” Clarke asked. 

“Obviously! Otherwise I wouldn’t be trying this number,” Echo said in the bitchiest tone Clarke had ever heard.

“Well, you might want to try leaving him a voicemail. He’ll get back to you when he can.”

“You know, your cousin is lucky to have me in his life, and if he wants to stay in it, he better call me.”

“I’ll be sure to pass on the message if I see him,” Clarke assured Echo in a mock tone.

Echo didn’t even give Clarke a chance to say goodbye because she hung up, the dial tone annoying Clarke’s ears. She made a mental note to talk to her mom about having it disconnected. She knew her dad used it a lot for business when he was still alive. Now, however, no one used it.

Annoyed with her day so far, she trudged up the stairs to the second level. Hearing a noise in Finn’s room, she  knocked on the door once before opening the door, and she found he was stuffing clothes wildly into his duffel bag. His room was in a bit of disarray at the moment. 

“What are you doing?” Clarke asked curiously as she plopped herself down on a part of the bed that wasn’t covered in music books or clothes. 

Finn glanced up and smiled at her, “I just got the best phone call,” he told her. He didn’t elaborate as he got distracted flipping through a folder filled with his music sheets.

“Well?” Clarke prompted. “Are you going to tell me what it was about?”

“There’s a music festival in London. One of the bands dropped out, and they asked if we wanted the spot. But I have to leave now,” he answered, barely looking up at her.

“That’s fantastic!” Clarke exclaimed. After what Finn said sunk in, she had to shake her head. “Wait, London, England?”

“One and the same!” Finn nodded his head excitedly. 

“Is Arkadia Academy going to defer your enrollment?” Clarke asked, ever the pragmatist. 

Finn Collins had just transferred to the elite academy in Arkadia. It was well known for their soccer team, and it was usually always ranked first in the state. She always thought the school was a bit too preppy for her tastes. Besides, her current school in Polis had the better academic record and her mother would never transfer her just so she could play soccer.

Abby Griffin was very much against soccer. Clarke was a debutant, and Abby wanted Clarke to be a beautiful, charismatic, and graceful addition to society. Soccer did not fit into those plans. Her mother would probably throw a party when she found out the soccer team had been cut. If Clarke thought her mom was in her face now about the different debutant events and balls before, it’d only get worse now that Clarke had more time on her hands. 

Clarke wanted to bang her head against the wall just thinking of it. Balls and charity events weren’t how she wanted to spend her high school years. But her mother didn’t quite understand that, yet. Abby had good intentions, Clarke knew, but they just weren’t on the same page.

“I was kind of hoping you could help me with that,” Finn said, cutting into Clarke’s thoughts. “Couldn’t you call in, pretend to be my mom, and just tell them I’m sick? My mom would never let me go to London if it’ll cause me to miss school.”

“You know you were kicked out of your last school for skipping. Do you really think it’s a good idea for you to start the new school year skipping?”

“Sometimes you have to break the rules to follow your dreams,” Finn replied. 

“Do you know the percentage of music artists that actually make it in the music industry?” Clarke asked frankly. Once Finn got something into his head, he wouldn’t change his mind. But that didn’t stop Clarke from trying.

“Probably the same as female soccer players or artists,” Finn retorted

Clarke frowned, “Your mom will kill us both if she finds out.”

“Then she better not find out,” Finn said. When he saw Clarke was still dubious, he continued, “My mom will think I went straight to school from here. As long as I make sure to call her a couple times, I don’t think we have anything to worry about there.”

“I guess,” Clarke relented. “I wish you could take me with you. I could use a vacation.”

“School hasn’t even started yet, and you want out already?” Finn asked, 

“They cut the soccer team,” Clarke explained, shrugging her shoulders.

“Ah,” Finn nodded in understanding. “Guess you better get used to wearing frilly dresses. I saw your mom come home with a couple new dresses today.”

Groaning, Clarke buried her face into Finn’s pillow. Would the day’s madness ever be over? Finn chuckled at her, but finished packing. 

“Oh, before I forget, that was Echo that just called,” Clarke told him.

“Someone actually uses that landline?” Finn asked in surprise.

“Did you give her that number?” Clarke wondered aloud.

Finn shrugged, “I might have when we first started dating so she could get ahold of me during emergencies. That was years ago, though.”

“Well, she wants you to call her back,” Clarke said. When Finn groaned, Clarke continued, “Why do you even date her?”

“She’s hot!” Finn said as if that explained everything.

“Ugh!” Clarke threw her hands up in the air in frustration. “Why are men such idiots!”

Finn laughed before zipping up his bag. “I gotta get going. My flight is in a couple of hours, and you know how bad traffic can be.”

Clarke nodded and stood up, pulling Finn in for a hug, “Good luck. You guys are going to do great!”

“Sure hope so!” he agreed. Slinging his bag over his shoulder, he pat Clarke on the shoulder before leaving. 

Clarke went to the window and watched him hail a cab. She watched as he placed his bag the trunk before slipping into the backseat. He glanced back up at the house and smiled, giving a small wave. Clarke wasn’t sure if he could see her or not, but she gave a half of a wave back. 

Sad that her cousin had to leave prematurely, she made her way towards her room. Her mom caught her before she could open the door, “Was that Finn I heard leaving?” she asked. “I thought he was staying until Sunday?”

“I guess he wanted to spend some time with his mom before going to school,” Clarke replied, trying to move around her mother, but her mother just stepped into her way.

“You’ll never guess what I bought today!” Abby told her happily. It hurt that Abby wanted Clarke to like the bells and whistles of being an elite, high class lady, but Clarke wanted the complete opposite. She had no interest in becoming another stepford wife for someone.

“If it’s another dress, I’m not interested,” Clarke informed her matter-of-factly, crossing her arms across her chest. 

“Won’t you at least just look at them? You might change your mind!” the hopefulness in her voice made Clarke cringe. 

“I’m not in the mood to have this conversation, Mom. Can we do it another time?” Clarke rubbed at her temples, the start of headache coming on.

“What’s wrong, sweetie?” Abby’s face fell to genuine concern.

“The school cut the girl’s soccer team,” Clarke answered after a moment of silence while she warred with herself if she should actually tell her mother. Her mother would feel bad for her but would ultimately be happy about the decision. Now Clarke could focus on being a debutant.

“That’s awful!” Abby exclaimed. “Did they say why?”

“Not enough girls signed up, and apparently the school makes more money off the boys team than the girls,” Clarke answered as she shoved her way past her mother and opened the door to her room, throwing her bag down next to her bed.

Her mother followed her, though she stayed near the doorway. If there was one thing Clarke was grateful for about her mother, it was that she always respected Clarke’s privacy. “Do you want me to make a phone call? The school board might listen to me.”

“No, but thank you, mom. I don’t want to create any tension with the school. I’ll just have to figure something else out,” Clarke replied.

“Now that you don’t have soccer, you can focus on the ball that’s coming up! You in a beautiful dress, Roan on your arm! It’ll be great!” Abby assured her.

“Well, hate to rain on your parade twice in one day, but I broke up with Roan,” Clarke informed her as she fell onto her bed, staring up at the ceiling.

“But why?” Abby asked, concern lacing her voice.

“I don’t feel like talking about it, okay, mom?” 

“But he’s so handsome and muscular and built,” Abby listed off all his physical attributes just like that made up who he was. She was being just as bad as the men she had to deal with today. 

“Then you date him, Mom,” Clarke retorted angrily.

“Will you try on the dresses at least?” Abby asked, flipping gears back to the original conversation. 

“Sorry mom. I’m not in the mood.”

“You know, you might as well be Finn.” With that, her mother turned on her heels and stormed out of the room. 

Clarke closed her eyes, trying not to think about how bleak her future looked at the moment. There had to be a way to fix this. Other after school programs she could take to keep her away from her mother and all the dresses she’d try to throw at Clarke. 

Her cell phone went off, startling Clarke. Reaching for it, she found she had a text message from Monty inviting her over to his place for movies and pizza, which sounded much better than crying in the shower. So she changed out of her soccer attire and into jeans and Tshirt, hurring over to their place.

She managed to elude her mother, which was a miracle in and of itself. She had expected an interrogation before she left Her mother was probably still hurt about Clarke’s lack of interest. A feeling of guilt washed over Clarke, but she just buried the feeling down deep beside all the other feelings she’d been suppressing. 

Several hours later, Clarke was laying on the coach with her head propped up in Monty’s lap. Their other friend Jasper was sitting on the floor playing cards with Monroe and Fox. The girls had just gotten done venting about their day, and the guys were trying to comfort them. 

“You don’t think your mom would let you guys transfer to Arkadia?” Monty asked them.

Monroe and Fox shook their heads. Fox answered, “Arkadia is way too expensive for my parents to afford to send me.”

“Mine would never be able to afford the tuition either,” Monroe sighed.

“You mom could easily afford to send you, Clarke,” Jasper said. “Why don’t you transfer?”

“My mom won’t transfer me because Polis has the better academics and high society debutante events. Polis is the better school to groom me to be a lady,” Clarke answered. “If I went to Arkadia, I’d be living on campus away from her. She’d never let me go.”

They all nodded their heads in agreement. It was a shitty position to be in. 

“But I’ve been toying around with an idea that I want to run by you,” Clarke told them, sitting up on the couch and turning to face them all.

The all turned in their seats, setting down the cards to give Clarke their undivided attention.

“Ok, this is going to be crazy, but just hear me out,” Clarke said, pausing for a moment before continuing. “My mom and I were sort of arguing about the dresses and my lack of interest, and she said something that gave me an idea. She said I might as well be Finn.”

The four of them were all frowning. Finally Jasper asked, “I don’t get it?”

“What if I got to Arkadia as Finn?” Clarke exclaimed excitedly.

“You want to be your cousin?” Monty asked dubiously. “I’m confused. What’s your plan?”

“I’m going to go to Arkadia Academy as Finn, make the boy’s soccer team, and beat Polis’ boys team in two weeks.”

“Have you taken some crazy pills today?” Monty asked.

“More like she’s been hit too many times in the head with soccer balls,” Jasper clarified.

“You guys know I’d be able to do it,” Clarke insisted.

“Right,” Monty agreed in a tone of voice that said he definitely didn’t agree “Except for your boobs- no offense, the mannerisms, the voice, the mentality-”

“No one there would even know the difference,” Monroe cut in, a smile playing at her lips as she started coming around to the idea. “No one’s met Finn, yet. It’d be perfect.”

“They’d no he’s a she!” 

“Come on, guys! If I get caught, that’ll be on me. But wouldn’t it be great if we could beat the system?” Clarke asked. 

“It’d be so satisfying,” Fox agreed.

Monty and Jasper were quiet before glancing at each other. “Fine,” they agreed begrudgingly. 

“But it’s going to take some time. We’ve got to make sure everything’s set up properly, alter some photos,” Monty said. 

Jasper continued, “You have to finder some binders, some clothes, false hair, a wig. You’ve got very feminine features that will be hard to mask.”

“I can do it,” Clarke assured them. “Thankfully, Finn also has some feminine features that could work to my advantage.”

Monroe and Fox agreed. “Tomorrow, we’ll go shopping and get all the things we need. Tomorrow night, we can set up the photo session?” Monroe asked, planning ahead.

“That should work. Once we get the photos, I’ll hack into their system and do the switch. Then you’re on your own,” Monty explained.

 

* * *

It was remarkably easy to find all the supplies they needed, a little pricey, but Clarke could afford it. Monty and Jasper had been able to hold up their end of the deal, and now Clarke was packing up her bag and trying to come up with a plausible excuse to tell her mother on why she’d be gone for the next two weeks. 

As she hurried down the stairs out to the waiting cab, she prayed her mother would be busy or not hear her leave. It’d be easier to lie over the phone than in person.However, her luck did not hold out, and her mother happened to be in the office when Clarke came downstairs.

“Clarke?” Abby called, getting up and hurrying into the hallway. “Where are you going?”

“I decided to go stay with Finn until school started. His visit was cut short, and I’d like to spend more time with him,” Clarke replied, turning back around to face her mother. 

“Clarke, we’ve hardly spent any time together this summer. I don’t think it’s wise of you to leave. You can spend next weekend with Finn, but I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to go for two weeks,” Abby insisted and went to grab Clarke’s things. 

“Mom, I’ve been thinking about what you said. I know you want me to be a debutante. And Finn’s girlfriend Echo will be there. I thought she could show me the ropes for the whole debutante thing,” Clarke said, lying through her teeth.

“This is so exciting! You’re going to have so much fun! There’s so much to do! There’s the ball, the luncheon, and the carnival next week, which Finn promised he’d go to. So make sure to remind him about it,” Abby told her, going through all of the things Clarke would need to go to.

“I will,” Clarke nodded her head, pulling her bag out of her mother’s hands. 

“Oh!” Abby smiled as she cupped Clarke’s face between her hands. “You’re going to be a lady!”

Clarke managed to smile and force out a laugh, “Yup! Sure am!” 

Abby pulled Clarke in for a hug, “I’ll miss you, sweetie.”

“I’ll miss you, too.” Then Clarke pulled away and hurried out the front door before her mother changed her mind.

She sighed in relief after giving the Lyft driver directions to Monty’s place. She’d get ready at his place before Monty dropped her off at her new school. She couldn’t wait to prove to everyone just how much of a force Clarke Griffin was. Polis would regret the day they didn’t take on the girl’s team. This wasn’t just for Clarke. This whole endeavor was to prove girls could keep up with the guys.

It was a challenge Clarke looked forward to.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was pleasantly surprised with the amount of love I'm getting for this story! I hope you guys continue to love reading the chapters as I do writing them! Thank you so much for your encouraging words!

As Monty pulled up to Arkadia Academy, the nerves started getting more and more prominent for Clarke. Arkadia Academy loomed in front of them, the students bustling about. Many of them were getting dropped off just as Clarke was about to. They all looked so happy and hopeful for the new school year. It all seemed completely normal.

What Clarke was about to do was anything other than normal. She expected, if she could pull it off, it would be a great story to tell people. But if she couldn’t pull this off, it could really screw up her future. She tried not to think of that fact. It made her want to run screaming in the other direction- all the hard work her friends had done be damned.

“Guys,” Clarke interrupted the guys’ banter about how long Clarke would be able to pull this off. “I don’t know if I can do this.” She wiped the sweat from her palms onto her school uniform pants. If she was this big of a wreck before even starting in on her lie, what would it be like when she met her roommate for the first time?

What if she was making a horrible decision? What if they kicked her out of school? With that reputation, she would have to move out of the area to finish school. Would colleges even look at her if this failed? She was breaking so many rules, and she’d be deceiving so many people. It had been easy to think about doing it, but now that she was looking it in the eye, she wasn’t sure she could go through with it.

“Don’t be getting cold feet now,” Monty told her as he pulled up in front of the school, placing the car in park before turning in his seat to face Clarke.

“Since when does Clarke Griffin get cold feet?” Jasper asked, leaning forward from the back seat. He placed his hand reassuringly onto her shoulder.

“Since she’s going to be impersonating a boy,” Clarke retorted, pulling down the visor to look into the mirror, pulling her wig into place. She still looked feminine, but she hoped it still looked somewhat natural. No one knew what Finn looked like, she reminded herself, it would be fine.

“Do your best Finn voice,” Monty instructed, trying to get her to focus on something other than the possibility of failure.

Clearing her throat, Clarke lowered her voice a little, “Yo, I’m Finn Collins, the new center forward.”

“Try more gravely,” Jasper suggested.

Clarke did as she was instructed, “Finn Collins, center forward.”

“Much better,” Monty and Jasper agreed, smiling at her encouragingly.

“Get out and show us your manly walk,” Monty told her.

Clarke turned and stared out the window of the car, watching the other students walk down the sidewalk. The moment she stepped out of the car was the moment all of this became real. There’d be no turning back. Everyone would see her, and she’d have to start in on the lie.

Taking a deep breath, she steeled herself to be immediately ridiculed and seen as a fake as she opened the car door and stepped out onto the sidewalk. A couple girls walking by nodded a greeting in Clarke’s direction, and she immediately tried to scramble back into the car.

“Oh my god, they knew!” she hissed at Jasper and Monty as she tried sneak back in. It wasn’t too late to stop this madness.

“What?” Monty asked, leaning forward into the passenger seat so that Clarke couldn’t get back in. “No, they didn’t. They just said hello!”

“They could tell just by looking at me,” Clarke cried.

“They were just being friendly!” Monty replied.

“Get out of that car this instant. You’re making a scene!” Jasper stage whispered at them as he got out of the car and attempted to pull Clarke out from behind.

“You guys need to take me home now,” Clarke insisted, not budging from her position as half in and half out of the car.

“No, we’re not. We worked really hard to get you here, and we’re not backing down now,” Monty told her, shoving at her shoulders.

“This was a mistake. They’re going to find out, and it’s going to ruin my life,” Clarke told them, as she shoved Monty’s hands away. 

“Clarke Griffin, you get out of this car now,” Monty whisper yelled at her as he shoved her forward. Jasper grabbed Clarke by the waist and pulled her fully out of the car while Monty crawled over the console and out of the passenger side of the car.

Standing up straight, Clarke smoothed down the wrinkles in her pants and made sure her wig was in place as she glanced around to see if anyone was staring at them. Thankfully, no one was paying them any attention; they all had much bigger things to be worrying about.

“Now show me your strut,” Jasper insisted as Monty slammed the car door. They just needed to get confident Clarke back.

Clarke sighed as she straightened her blazer jacket. After taking a deep breath, she turned and walked a few paces away, mimicking the way Monty walked. On her way back, she mimicked Jasper’s walk. She’d been doing her homework and had started mimicking all the guys she saw. If she was going to mimic a guy, she wanted to do it right.

“Good,” Jasper approved. “Now hawk a loogie.”

Clarke wrinkled her nose. “Hawk a loogie? What, am I going to be doing that a lot?” she asked slightly appalled.

Jasper shrugged, “You never know when the occasion might arise. You have to be ready for anything.”

After giving Jasper a look, she glanced around to make sure there weren’t too many people watching before she spat her best loogie onto the sidewalk. She felt gross for doing it, but it was for a good cause.

“I’m so proud,” Monty cut in before Clarke could say anything else. “We’ve raised you well.”

“You’ve made Monty and me very proud fathers,” Jasper jested, unable to stop himself from laughing at his own joke.

“Well, you guys have been the best dads any trouble making son could ask for,” Clarke continued with the joke.

They really had been a great support base. She wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for them hooking her up with everything that she would need. They had been oddly serious about the situation, genuinely helping her without any questions asked. Of course, they joked about certain aspects of the whole thing- because really, this was a hilarious situation. Clarke was just a bit too close to see that now.

“Just remember: Inside every girl, there’s a boy,” Jasper told her. “Wait...”

“That did not come out right, but you get the gist,” Monty replied. “Go get ‘em, Tiger!”

Clarke nodded before grabbing her bags from the trunk and started heading up the sidewalk onto campus. She turned back once to wave goodbye to the guys. They wave furiously at her before she continued down the sidewalk in search of her dorm.

There were a ton of students on campus already unpacked or procrastinating unpacking. As Clarke walked, she watched as several were throwing a frisbee back and forth on the green, there were tables set up all over to help people find whatever they needed, but most of the students were kids trying to find their way to their own dorm rooms the same as Clarke was.

Fortunately, Clarke knew which dorm and room number hers was. She just had to find it. Thankfully, people at the tables were friendly and pointed her in the right direction. She’d successfully had a conversation with someone who didn’t immediately know she was actually a girl. Winning!

The entire walk, her heart pounded, waiting for someone to shout that she was a fraud. Someone was bound to see through the disguise. Blessedly, no one did, and she had been able to walk the campus in relative peace. It was a miracle.

As she pulled open the door to her dorm building, she saw guys running through the halls, throwing things at each other. Laughter and yelling and teasing filled the hallway. Some were dressed, some had no shirt, and some were running around in only a towel. It was pure chaos.

She could do this. She was Finn Collins, a dude, a boy, a man. She was an attractive, feminine man. She could do this. She could be a man. She just needed to act cocky, like she owned the place.

Winding her way through the hall, she ducked under basketballs and tried not to trip over the soccer balls getting kicked around. It was hard not to run into anyone as she turned corners, as it always seemed someone was barreling down the hallway. Everything was a mess, and it took everything in Clarke not to panic.

Thankfully, she found her room number and found the door to be open. Hurrying between two boys, she practically fell into the room, spun, and slammed the door shut. Leaning her forehead against the coolness of the dorm, she seriously wondered how she was going to fit in here with all this madness. 

Letting out a deep breath, she turned and found herself staring at three boys who were all staring at her. She needed to make a good first impression, she knew. Of all the people she needed to get along with on campus, she needed it to be her roommates. It wouldn’t make this situation any better to be living with a person who hated her for two weeks. And if she could trick her roommate into thinking she was a boy, she could trick anyone into believing it.

“Hey,” she said, and then realizing that had come out more feminine than she wanted, she cleared her voice and tried again, deeper and gravellier like Monty and Jasper had instructed. “Hey!” And that came out like she was yelling. She wanted to hit her head against the wall. Coughing to cover up her blunder, she just continued, “What’s up?”

Do something cool, she told herself. So, she tried to throw her keys in the air and catch them. You know, what cool kids do. Instead, the keys bounced off her palm, and she looked like an idiot as she fumbled to catch them. Just get to the bed, throw your stuff down, and be cool!

Clarke Griffin, girl, was not used to being such a mess. She wasn’t necessarily popular, but she didn’t normally come off so stiff and rigid. Clarke Griffin, girl, was a natural born leader who got things done and wasn’t scared of anything. Clarke “Finn Collins”, boy, was a giant klutz apparently who couldn’t say anything the way it was supposed to come out.

“You guys must be my roommates,” she tried again when no one immediately said anything.

One of the guys was only wearing a towel around his waist as he was digging through a bag. He chuckled a little at her awkwardness. “What’s your name?” he asked.

Clarke finally managed to get to the bed and dump her stuff onto it without looking like a bumbling fool. “I’m Finn Collins.” Clarke held her hand out to the guy,

“I’m Bellamy Blake,” he took Clarke’s hand.

Jasper and Monty were always doing secret handshakes and the like, so Clarke decided it would be cool to do one of them with Bellamy. So, when Bellamy accepted Clarke’s handshake, she pulled him in for a hug as well, clapping Bellamy on the back.

“Okay,” Bellamy seemed surprised, caught off guard. “Okay,” he pulled himself away rather forcefully and Clarke was a little concerned as to what she had done wrong. Her friends did it all the time. “Uh, this here is Miller and Murphy, they’ll be next door.” Bellamy gestured to his friends.

Clarke waved politely at them.

“Freshman dorm’s that way,” Miller told her, a frown on his face.

“Seriously, how old are you?” Murphy asked.

She hadn’t taken into consideration that she’d look that young to these guys. “Uh, I skipped a couple grades,” she replied, laughing slightly to cover up how nervous this whole conversation was making her. The longer she had it, the worse she began to feel. Lying was never her forte.

Turning, she headed for the bed, tripping slightly on the edge of it as she tried to sit down. She closed her eyes as she tried to get situated. She couldn’t even look Bellamy in the eyes. What must he think of her? That she was a klutzy idiot? A socially inept moron? A freak? All would be correct. Her entire face was on fire and she could only imagine how red her face must be at the moment.

“So, uh, when’s soccer tryouts?” Clarke asked, trying to get back onto solid ground. She was losing them. She needed to get them to think she was okay.

“Tomorrow,” Bellamy answered. “You play?” Clarke had to give him credit for at least attempting to be nice and converse with her still.

“Absolutely. Center forward,” Clarke answered. “Do you play the beautiful game, bro? Brothers? Brethren?” God, she needed to stop talking, she was just making this ten times worse.

Bellamy laughed before answering, “Yeah, I’m a striker. Murphy and Miller are halfbacks.”

“Sweet!” Clarke nodded before turning to start unpacking her bags. The sooner this conversation ended the better.

Pulling out her shoes, she set them aside while she dug out her uniforms. They needed to be hung up right away before they wrinkled. As she pulled them out of the bag, her hand hit her shoe, which was hiding her tampons, causing the shoe to fall onto the floor and making her box of tampons extremely visible.

“Why do you have tampons?” Bellamy asked, a little concerned. And even with her back to the boys, she could hear Miller and Murphy get up and stand behind Bellamy, waiting for her answer.

Clarke wanted to crawl under her bed and never come out. Think,think, think! Why would a boy have tampons? Thankfully, one of the other reasons Clarke had excelled being team captain was that she was quick to think on her feet. “Nosebleeds,” she blurted. “I get really bad nosebleeds.”

“So, you stick them up your nose?” Murphy asked confused.

Just go with it, Clarke told herself before turning around. “Uh, yeah. What?” she made herself look concerned. “You’ve never done that?” The boys all shook their heads in unison. “Oh, Beckham does it all the time!”

“Seriously?” Bellamy asked.

“Duh, that’s why I started doing it. I figured if a great soccer player such as him was doing it, it’s got to be the right thing to do. Look,” she bent down to retrieve her shoe and grabbed a tampon from the box. Pulling it out of the wrapper, she explained, “you take that off, whatever that is,” she threw away the plastic applicator, “and you stick it into your nose. It absorbs right up!” Clarke stuffed the tampon up her nose.

The boys burst out laughing, turning away from her. “My god, your roommate’s a freak!” Murphy told Bellamy, elbowing him in the side.

Clarke turned around, tampon still up her nose. Sighing, she took it out and threw it away quickly. She just needed to keep a low profile for the rest of the day. Tomorrow in soccer tryouts, she’d show them how good she was and earn their respect that way.

Thankfully, the guys left her alone to unpack and mostly ignored her. They stayed in the room playing video games, which Clarke didn’t mind. This gave her a good chance to observe them and get a feel for them, to learn what she could about them.

It didn’t take her long to unpack as she didn’t bring much since she wouldn’t be here for long anyway. When she finished, she grabbed her sketchpad, her pencil, and her phone and settled onto her bed. The boys didn’t really acknowledge her existence, which was fine with her.

Grabbing her phone, she pulled up her text messages. Finding the group chat between her, Jasper, Monty, Monroe, and Fox, she typed in a quick message:  **Met my roommate. Cover isn’t blown yet.**

Immediately, Monroe replied:  **Never a doubt in my mind you could do this.**

Jasper’s reply came shortly after:  **I had some doubt.**

**Making friends?** Monty asked.

**I don’t think I made a great first impression. Roommate is playing video games with friends and ignoring me.** Clarke replied.

**Please tell me you aren’t moping on your bed and sketching** Monroe typed.

Clarke frowned, not knowing what could be wrong with sketching.  **So?**

**You need to be social!** Fox told her.

**I don’t want to shove myself at them on the first night!** Clarke defended herself. And she didn’t. If she asked to play video games, they’d probably let her, but they clearly didn’t want to.

**Sketching isn’t manly!** Jasper informed her.

**What should I do instead? Pretend to shave my nonexistent beard?** Sketching wasn’t manly? Since when? She glanced up at the guys, whose backs were to her. She didn’t think they really cared what she was doing so long as she didn’t bother them.

**Is there a TV? Turn on soccer, Monty** suggested.  **Manly men watch sports.**

**And yell at the TV about stupid calls even though the refs can’t hear them,** Fox agreed.

**If they’re passionate, they even break things,** Monroe said.

Clarke chuckled to herself. She wouldn’t mind watching a soccer game, though she for sure would not be yelling at the TV or breaking anything. She didn’t need her roommate and his friends thinking she had anger problems.

**I’ll just watch the game quietly, I think** , Clarke texted back before she shoved her sketchpad in her bedside table drawer. Reaching for her laptop, she found a game she could stream online, turned the volume down to low and settled in.

After Murphy and Miller left, Bellamy asked what game she was watching, and they chatted for a few minutes about it, but then Bellamy went to bed, leaving Clarke alone with her thoughts. She turned the game off, not wanting to keep Bellamy awake. Putting her laptop back on her desk, she grabbed her toiletries and pajamas and hurried to the bathroom, hoping to change in a stall.

Thankfully, there was one open, and she was able to change in peace. She hurried to brush her teeth and get back to her room before anyone else came in. She had met her quota for socializing for the day and just wanted to go to sleep.

She was in luck. Only a couple other boys came into the bathroom and all left her alone. It was a bit of a shock when she was brushing her teeth to see a boy walk in. She wanted to tell them to get out of the girls’ room, but then realized where she was. How long before all of this became her new normal?

As Clarke slipped beneath her comforter, she had never been so excited to sleep as she was at that moment. She was sure she was out before her head even hit the pillow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd love to hear your guys thoughts on this!   
> I'm so glad this is a story people are interested in reading!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so excited about the amount of interest in this story! I'm thinking if you guys stayed interested I could start posting a chapter a week.

The next morning, she found herself lined up on the soccer field beside Bellamy while their coach walked up and down the line, taking in each recruit. He had introduced himself as Coach Marcus Kane. Clarke wasn’t sure how she felt about this coach, yet. 

Coach Marcus Kane had apparently been pretty good back in the day. Bellamy had filled her in on what little he had known of him. Bellamy had made the team the previous few years, so he knew the ins and outs. Marcus Kane had played soccer in college and had even played at a National level until a knee injury had brought him back to his hometown. Unable to play, he decided to do the next best thing. 

As he went down the line, he made snide remarks about a couple of the individuals. Clarke was waiting for him to say something about her, but he passed her over without a second glance. She wasn’t sure if that was such a good thing.

“We’re going to split up between shirts and skins,” Coach Kane finally told them all after his assessment was over. He wasn’t yelling, but his voice was loud, demanding respect.

Clarke swore anyone in the vicinity would be able to hear her heartbeat start to race in her chest. She cleared her throat and inched forwards towards the coach, trying to get out earshot of those around her. She didn’t want to cause a scene in front of her teammates. “Excuse me, Coach! I need to be a shirt,” she informed him praying to any entity that might be listening that he’d let her be a shirt without asking any questions. 

The higher beings of power were not merciful today. “What?” Coach turned his full attention to Clarke, and she did everything in her power not to back down or turn away. 

“I’m allergic to the sun,” was Clarke’s reply as she stared straight ahead. It was stupid, and she wanted to hide under a rock, but it had been the only thing her brain came up with. There had to be a million plausible explanations for needing to be a shirt, but her brain couldn’t think of one.

“You’re allergic to the sun?” Kane asked for clarification. Clarke had hoped maybe he’d laugh it off, think it was a funny joke. But Kane was all business, nothing but serious. His face didn’t look even an ounce of amused. She was not making a very good impression with her new coach.

“Very, very deathly allergic,” Clarke explained, digging herself deeper and deeper into the stupid lie. Obviously she wasn’t allergic, she was out in it right now. Praying silently to herself this conversation would be over, she waited for Kane to say something.

He stared at her for a moment, as if waiting for her to admit this was some twisted joke. When Clarke didn’t say anything further, Kane finally said, “We like to accommodate here at Arkadia, so I’ll find you a parasol. Will that do?” Clarke nodded but didn’t say anything as Kane checked his clipboard. “You’re a shirt.” He told her before walking away from her and blowing his whistle for practice to officially start.

Everyone hustled to their positions, and Clarke attended one of the more grueling practices of her life. At Polis Academy, they had some tough practices. But nothing like this. She was pushed harder and longer than anything she was used to. By the end of practice, her limbs felt like noodles, and she knew she’d be sore for a week. Arkadia Academy was on a whole other level from Polis. It was no wonder they were so good.

Clarke pushed herself to keep up. Luckily, she was just as fast as most of the other athletes, but their soccer skills were much more advanced than anything she could do. She was just thankful she could keep up with most of the drills. She needed to make the team. It was her be all, end all goal. Anything less wouldn’t be good enough, and it would mean everything she’d done to get here would be meaningless.

She’d been on campus less than twenty four hours, but here on the field, Clarke felt comfortable. She knew the game of soccer. She’d been playing most all of her life- at the consternation of her mother. Most of the drills were the same as those she did at Polis, so there really weren’t any curveballs thrown at her. 

As she went through the drills, she watched Bellamy when she could. He was good. Damn good. He made everything look so effortless, which he should considering this would be his fourth year playing under Coach Kane. Clearly, Bellamy had been playing the game as long as Clarke. She wondered if she could work her way up to asking him to teach her some of his moves.

After a couple hours, Coach Kane pulled them into a huddle at center field to make the announcement of who made the team and who didn’t. The moment of truth was upon them, and Clarke was practically giddy with excitement. It would all come down to this.

“I’m very proud of the intensity and the commitment I saw out on that field today. Makes a coach very happy to see that,” Coach Kane said as he looked around the circle of athletes surrounding him. “Now, I’ve decided to split up the players into first and second stringers. Second stringers, don’t take it too hard. You’re just as important as the first stringers. Apart, of course, from playing the game.” He chuckled to himself slightly before he started calling out names and teams. 

It was in instances like this that her coach slightly terrified her. On the outside, he didn’t seem that different than any other guy. Long, shaggy hair, a couple days worth of a beard started. He wasn’t tall and imposing. But he had an arrogance about him. He knew he was important. It was the air about him that made people leary around him. That, and how he sometimes could cut deep with his remarks and not think anything of it.

Of all the people she didn’t wanted to stay on their good side, it was Coach Kane. 

Bellamy, Miller, and Murphy made it to first string of course. And she was waiting for her name to be called. There was only a sliver of doubt in her mind that she would make it. She hadn’t been that bad in practice. She had to have made it.

When Coach called out the second string players, Collins was the last one on the list. She’d barely even made it to the second string team. She couldn’t believe it. Holding the jersey they were given, Clarke wanted to cry. Everything Jasper and Monty had done for her was ruined, all for nothing.

How could she not have made it to first string? She had been just as fast. Granted, she hadn’t been as strong, nor had she known all the tricks or had the same skills the others had, but she had more passion to play than anyone else on the team. There had to be something she could do to get the Coach to change his mind.

“Hit the showers, boys!” Coach Kane called before he walked back to the school. The other players following closely behind making their way into the locker room. 

Cursing herself and lack of foresight, she tried to think of an excuse to get out of showering in here. She needed to go back to her room and shower in the dorms. But as she tried for the door, she bumped into Miller and Murphy who shuffled her around towards the showers, handing her a towel. 

Panic was beginning to set it, her breathing becoming more rapid. Just as she was about to say something stupid to get out of it, Coach Kane walked into the locker room calling for her. 

“Collins! You’re needed in Principal Jaha’s office immediately. You can take your shower after,” Coach told her, his hands clasped behind his back.

“Yes, Coach,” she nodded, handing him her towel before she practically ran out of the locker room, thanking the universe for this shred of good luck on an otherwise bleak day.

As she neared the principal’s office, she tried to run through scenarios on why Principal Jaha would want to speak with her? Was there something wrong with her transcripts? Did he suspect something was amiss? She hadn’t met the principal, yet, so she wasn’t sure how he could be suspicious already. Truly clueless, she made her way into the office. 

“I’m here to see Principal Jaha,” Clarke told the secretary sitting in the front desk.

The secretary nodded and led her into an office behind her desk. “Principal Jaha will be right back, he said to take a seat.”

Clarke nodded and thanked the woman as she shut the door. Looking around the room, Clarke took in all the plagues on the walls and trophies on the bookshelf. Reading through a couple, it looked like Jaha took his job as principal very seriously.

Taking a deep breath, Clarke tried to calm her nerves. It had to be nothing. It had to be. But what if it wasn’t? What if Jaha realized her friends had hacked into Finn’s files and altered the picture? She was just thankful if he was busting her, he was doing it in the privacy of his office and not in front of everyone. As if she hadn’t embarrassed herself enough.

Her eyes suddenly caught on the file cabinet behind Principal Jaha’s desk. She needed to check the file, see what they had. Glancing behind her, she made an impulsive, totally against the rules decision and hurried over to the file cabinet and pulled it open.

Collins…. Collins… Collins. Found it!

Grabbing the file, she realized it was bigger than any of the other files she’d sorted through. It was to be expected though. Finn had skipped school, gotten thrown out of Polis High, and had landed in juvie for a couple months for shoplifting and doing some other stupid stuff she couldn’t believe. 

She barely had time to look at anything when the door flew open and Jaha entered the room. Thankfully, when he entered, he was focused on the door and hadn’t looked at Clarke yet. She quickly slammed the file back in place and closed the file cabinet in one swift motion, spinning around and trying to distance herself from it. She made a show of looking over some of the plagues on the wall.

“Finn Collins,” Jaha said as he finally looked up at Clarke. He smiled as he walked over. Principal Jaha was an imposing sort of guy at first glance, but when he smiled, Clarke knew he was a decent man. As he walked over to Clarke, he held out his hand to her, “I’m Headmaster Thelonius Jaha.I just wanted to say welcome to Arkadia Academy.”

Clarke accepted his hand and shook it firmly. “Thank you. Nice to meet you, sir.”

“I just wanted to check in and see how you’re doing,” Jaha told her. She expected him to sit, but he stood there staring at her. She wasn’t sure what she was supposed to do with herself or say.

“Doing great,” Clarke told him. She couldn’t very well tell him she was dying inside from the secrets and that this charade was the hardest thing she’s ever done in her life.

“Good,” Jaha seemed satisfied with the answer. He turned to the file cabinet. “Let’s take a look at your file shall we?” He opened up the cabinet and took out the file. Turning, he set it on his desk, and Clarke turned around for a second to take a breath and steady her nerves. “Ok, you’re busted.”

All of the color drained out of Clarke’s face as she whipped around to face Jaha. This was it. He knew. Everyone knew. She was going to have to go home with her tail between her legs, their masterful plan ruined. The days of planning and prepping wasted. A part of her wanted to break down and cry. The longer Jaha went without saying anything, the harder it felt to breath.

“I know you don’t want to talk to the headmaster, but I’m not going to take no for an answer. Take a seat.” Jaha told her, gesturing to the chair in front of him - in his chair- the headmaster's chair. When Clarke hesitated, he reached out for her shoulder and prodded her into the chair before he walked around the desk and sat in the seat opposite of Clarke. 

Clarke had to admit he had a way of disarming a person and making them constantly guess what he was going to do next. It was very disconcerting. He didn’t seem angry or upset, which was making it very hard for her to try and guess what he wanted to talk about.

“Now, I used to be a transfer student once upon a time,” he told her. “Back when dinosaurs roamed the earth as the kids like to say these days. So I take a special interest in all the transfer students that come through Arkadia and act as unofficial big brother.”

Nodding her head in understanding, Clarke smiled, “That’s awesome.”

“Don’t be surprised if I pop in from time to time to see how you’re doing,” he told her. 

“I look forward to it,” Clarke told him. It was exactly the opposite of what she wanted. If these were normal circumstances, then maybe she’d appreciate what Jaha was trying to do. At the moment, she wanted to be left alone and as far out of the spotlight as she could possibly get.

“Great,” Jaha smiled and glanced down at Finn’s file. “I know you have a bit of a record. But I believe in fresh starts and second chances. I just wanted to let you know if you ever need anything, you can come talk to me.”

“Thank you, sir. I appreciate that,” Clarke meant it. He sure seemed to mean well. It was nice to know that when Finn came back, he’d have someone trustworthy to go to if he needed anything. 

“I know you got better places to be,” Jaha said, gesturing to the door. 

Smiling in thanks, Clarke got up headed for the door as quickly as possible. All in all, it wasn’t a bad meeting, but she just wanted to put some distance between herself and the principal. She opened the door and hurried out the door, glancing behind her to see if Jaha was following. 

Because she wasn’t paying an ounce of attention to where she was going, she ran right into a girl who was walking in front of the door.This wasn’t one of those instances where it throws you off balance or where you drop what you were holding. This was one of those times where the force of the impact sends you sprawling to the floor and all of their stuff goes everywhere. And she felt immensely stupid.

“I am so sorry,” Clarke apologized as she scrambled to her feet and grabbing the books and stray papers off of the floor as the girl got to her feet.

As they both stood up, Clarke finally got a good look at her. She was very pretty with long, dark hair pulled back into a ponytail, stray strands of baby hairs framing her face. She had bold, brown eyes and an understanding countenance about her. 

Glancing down, Clarke noticed her shoes, “Hey, cool shoes,” she commented. 

“Thanks,” the girl said, “I got them at Anthropology.” She smoothed out her hair, running her fingers through some of the tangles.

“No way! They have shoes there?” Clarke racked her brain and thought back to the times she’d gone into the store. She couldn’t remember seeing any. She’d remember if she had.

“Yeah, right next to the accessories,” the girl answered, nodding her head.

“Huh.” Suddenly Clarke hears herself and remembers where she is and who she’s supposed to be. If this were any other moment, if she could just be Clarke Griffin, she’d want to talk to this girl more. As it was, she was supposed to be Finn Collins. Clearing her throat, she took on the deeper tone that she was supposed to be talking with, “Here are your books.”

“Thanks,” the girl takes her books, shuffling them in her arms to a comfortable position. When she glances back up at Clarke, it’s with an expression Clarke can’t quite read. 

To cover up her giant mistake, she tries again. She needs to be as manly as possible to help repair the damage talking about shoes has done. “Okay, Well, I’m gonna go take care of some guy stuff.” She had no idea what that guy stuff would be, but clearly, not talking about shoes. Turning on her heel, she hurried out of the office, down the hall and back to her dorm to change. 

If she didn’t die of a heart attack by the end of the day, it would be a miracle. She’d thought she’d ggt bused three separate times in about an hour, Her heart couldn’t take much more of this. She couldn’t wait for things to calm down so she could relax a bit more.

As she neared the dorms, she realized it was around lunch time, and she was hungry and wanted to get something to eat. However, she couldn’t show up smelling like she did. There were people coming and going, so the best she could do was wash her face and arms in the sink.

She felt disgusting as she pulled on nice, clean clothes.For the finishing touches, Clarke  used a ton of deodorant. She repulsed herself. As long as she didn’t get too close to anyone, she should be fine. She’d just have to get up in the middle of the night and hope she could sneak in a shower without anyone coming in. Taking a look in the mirror, she sighed. She would have to make due. 

Hurrying out of her room to the cafeteria for lunch, she found Bellamy, Miller, and Murphy sitting around a table.  “Hey, dudes! Mind if I join?” Clarke asked as she sat down at the empty chair, her tray clattering as she dropped it on the table, causing her juice bottle to fall over. Righting it, she glanced up nervously at the guys. They looked less than impressed with her. Clearing her throat, she tried for a different topic.. “So those soccer tryouts were bogus, huh? I mean, second string? That’s ridiculous! Am I right?” She expected them to at least attempt to hide their distaste for her, to at least stick up for her in this. She knew she wasn't bad at soccer. But they stayed silent. It stung more than she thought it would. Trying again, she said,  “So the game against Polis, that’ll be interesting, right?”

“And why would that be interesting?” Bellamy asked, a smirk on his face like he knew something Clarke didn’t. If she didn’t know any better, she’d say Bellamy thought pretty highly of himself, thought he was better than everyone else. He was good, she knew. But obviously not that humble.

“Well,” Clarke explained, leaning forward, determined to actually get in a conversation with them. “My cousin goes there, and she used to date that toolbag Roan, their goalie.”

Each of the boys started laughing like they were in on some big joke together, and Clarke felt completely lost and out of her element. 

“I know him,” Bellamy told her..”I once made him cry during a game.” Bellamy seemed very proud by this moment, and the guys all thought it was hilarious..

As Clarke thought about what he said, she remembered Roan telling her about this. Of course he spun it differently to her so that he came away as the victim. “Wait, that was you?” Clarke aske, slightly impressed. She wished she could make Roan cry at the moment.

“Absolutely,” Bellamy nodded, that smirk still front and center. At the moment, she didn’t mind. As long as it was at Roan’s expense and not at hers.

“That was so funny,” Miller was still chuckling to himself at the image. 

“Wow,” Clarke had a new appreciation for her roommate.

“Is your cousin hot?” Murphy asked, and suddenly the mood at the table shifted, all keenly waiting for the answer. As if that was the most important thing to know about her.

“Uhh,” Clarke wasn’t entirely sure how to answer. She didn’t think she’d have to talk about herself to her roommate and his friends while pretending to be someone else. “I guess so,” she nodded and then added. “She’s got a great personality.”

“Ew,” Murphy grimaced and looked away, finding her food suddenly more interesting than the thought of a girl with a personality. 

The four of them sat in silence for a while- a silence Clarke desperately wanted to fill. She knew her rambling wouldn’t help matters, so she held her tongue and shoveled food into her mouth the same as them. It seemed they just wanted to get done quickly and get away from her. Which they probably did. 

“In coming,” warned Miller, startling Clarke. 

Glancing up, Clarke found that they were talking about the girl she had literally run into earlier. She was with a couple of other girls, laughing and smiling with them as they sat down a couple tables away. “Look at the booty on that brunette,” Clarke said, thinking of something a guy might say in this situation. They were always looking at women’s asses, right?

“Uh-Oh,” Miller muttered under his breath

“Don’t talk about her like that,” Bellamy warned her, and he seemed the most upset he’d been since Clarke and he had met. Clearly, this was someone he cared about.

“Oh, is that your girlfriend?” Clarke teased. If Bellamy had a girlfriend for real, she figured she’d have seen or heard about her by now. Since that wasn’t the case, she figured he was pining for her from afar. 

“Ha, he wishes,” Murphy laughed. Bellamy gave him a cold look, shutting him up quickly. 

“Up until recently, she was dating this college guy, but he dumped her. I hear she’s a total mess right now,” Miller informed them. “Confidence and self esteem way down.”

“In other words,” Murphy cut in, “time to pounce.” Clarke was disgusted that they’d be talking about a woman in this way. If what they said was true, she didn’t seem some douchey guys hitting on her like that. They’d made fun of her for talking about her like she was an object, yet they talked about wanting to get to her while she was lonely and miserable. 

Clarke stared at her, “She looks so sad. It’s heartbreaking.” When she glanced back at the guys, they were all giving her a really weird look. “What? I can relate. I just got out of a bad relationship, too. You think you know someone, but you realize it’s all been a big lie. Every touch. Every kiss.” It was hard not to think of Roan, she missed him, but he’d betrayed her trust, her values. It made her question everything he ever did. Had he always never believed in her?

Everyone got up to leave almost immediately. Clearly, guys didn’t talk about breakups, or how terrible they made you feel. Or they just weren’t at that level of friendship yet that they could feel comfortable talking about that kind of stuff with each other. Maybe one day. Clarke hoped so anyway. She wanted them to like her..

“Ok, catch up with you later!” she called after them as she sad by herself at the table. Sighing to herself, she grabbed her phone from her pocket.

**I smell like rotten cabbage,** she texted Monroe, Fox, Jasper, and Monty in the group chat.

**Manly cabbage,** came Jasper’s reply.

**I met a girl today. Super nice. Very pretty,** Clarke informed them.

**You gonna date her? Might up your street cred with the guys,** Monroe pointed out.

**Can’t. Roommate is unrequitedly in love with her,**  Clarke informed them. As much as she liked the girl, she couldn’t fathom trying to date her and pretending to be a guy. She couldn’t do that to someone. It would be the biggest of dick moves. Besides, Bellamy liked her, and she wasn’t about to get in the way.

**Ah, unrequited love,** Jasper wrote, being his usual, wistful self. 

**Seriously, what should I do about the smell?**  Clarke asked. It was her biggest concern at the moment, something she needed to get figured out ASAP.

**Two AM showers?** Monty suggested.

**Lots of cologne?** Asked Fox.

**Use baby wipes,**  Monroe tried.

**Three AM showers,** Jasper told her.

The baby wipes were a good idea, but she didn’t have any. Nor did she have the money, time, or resources of getting off campus to get them. She didn't’ have any cologne. She’d only bought the Ax deodorant, thinking it would be all she needed to smell manly. So the middle of the night showers it would have to be.

So she tried it. She set an alarm for two thirty in the morning and hoped it wouldn’t wake up Bellamy. But when the alarm went off, she must have snoozed it because the next time she looked at the clock, it was five in the morning. Cursing herself, she hurriedly slipped out of bed and grabbed her shower caddie and a towel, sneaking into the bathroom and finding it empty.

She could have cried she was so excited. Happily taking off her binder, she got ready to take off her sweatshirt when she heard footsteps. Glancing up, she found Bellamy walking into the bathroom in nothing but his shorts. He had his toiletry kit with him. 

Hanging her head, she knew she wasn’t going to be getting her shower in today either. She really wanted to bang her head against the wall, but she forced herself to address Bellamy, “‘Sup, dog?” 

Bellamy smiled, indulging her. “Yeah, homie,” he placed his stuff onto the counter and started sorting through it. 

Good, she could grab her stuff and get the hell out of here. “Later.” If she could have ran out of there, she would have. She’d come very close to Bellamy figuring out her secret.

“Hey,” Bellamy called out. “You forgot this, Julio.” He held up her binding wraps in confusion, having no idea what they were. 

Mortified, Clarke grabbed them from him, stuffing them in her caddie. “Thanks, G’Man,” and then she bolted for the door and hurrying into their dorm room where she quickly used water from her water bottle and some body wash and scrubbed under her armpits before Bellamy came back in. 

The smell was mostly in her binding wraps now. And there was nothing she was going to be able to do to fix that until she figured out a way to disappear while she did laundry. IF someone ran into her without the binder on, they’d know she wasn’t a he. Defeated, Clarke quickly changed for the day. She was going to call Jasper and Monty and have them take her home.

Her nerves couldn’t handle much more of this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keep letting me know what you guys are thinking of this story. I'm really excited for what's to come! I hope you guys keep enjoying. I love reading all of your wonderful comments!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has probably been one of my favorite chapters so far!

“Why are you calling me? What is this? The 1990s?” Jasper asked when he answered Clarke’s call. She could hear Monty talking in the background but couldn’t make out what he was saying.

“I need your help,” Clarke told him. She glanced around her to see if anyone was paying her any attention. No one was. Typical. She’d found a semi-secluded spot near the soccer field, well away from everyone else. No one was practicing at the moment, but she enjoyed being out there nonetheless. It was calm. Quiet.

“Let me put you on speaker so Monty can hear, too,” Jasper told her. Clarke waited patiently for a few moments. “Okay, you’re on speaker. You need our help and go.”

Sighing, Clarke said, “I really need to shower.”

“That’s it?” Jasper asked with exasperation. “That’s what you need our help for?”

“I haven’t been able to shower for the last couple of days. I’m convulsing people! And it would just be really good to see you guys. I haven’t made any friends here. I miss you guys,” she told them honestly. While she did really need a shower, she mostly wanted to see them to be surrounded by people who actually enjoyed her presence.

“I guess we can let you come over for a shower,” Monty told her, acting as though her request was monumentally inconveniencing. “But you can’t keep coming over to our place all the time for a shower. You’re going to have to figure out a way to do it at school.”

“I know. I meant to get up in the middle of the night, but I kept snoozing my alarms. This is the only time I’ll ask. I just need to figure out a way to get back onto even ground at the moment. I feel like I’m in quicksand with no help in site,” Clarke replied.

“We’ll head over now and grab you,” Monty answered.

“Thanks, guys! I owe you one,” she said.

“Oh, you owe us a lot more than just one,” Jasper joked before hanging up the phone.

Jasper was absolutely right. She owed them for all of this. She wouldn’t be standing in Arkadia Academy right now if it weren’t for them. Even before all of this, Jasper and Monty had her back through everything. They’d met in kindergarten and had been practically inseparable ever since. Clarke’s mom tolerated them; the boys seemed to always get Clarke in trouble growing up. Clarke’s dad had loved them since Monty and Jasper were both so smart.

Waiting patiently at the curb in front of the building, Clarke tried not to think too much about how depressing coming to Arkadia Academy had become. Classes hadn’t even started yet, and she already wanted to leave.

Clarke needed to figure out a way to get on the first string for soccer. If she and Bellamy had become closer, she’d just ask him to work with her, but she didn’t feel comfortable doing that just yet. Murphy and Miller gave no indication that they’d even want to tolerate her for more than a few seconds let alone long enough to practice with her. She didn’t know anyone else on the team really, yet. She’d just have to work really hard in practice and maybe put in some hours before and after to get better.

Monty’s familiar Cadillac pulled up to the school as Clarke was trying to work out a schedule that would work for her. Jumping up, a smile broke out onto her face for the first time in what felt like forever. It had only been a couple days, but she’d missed her friends immensely. They usually hung out every day!

Shuffling into the backseat of the car, Clarke grinned at her friends. Jasper turned to give her a one arm hug awkwardly from his perch in the passenger seat. “Oh, man! You weren’t joking about the smell.” He backed up quickly, straightening in his seat.

Monty wrinkled his nose in disgust, “Why don’t we roll down the window?” He rolled down the window in the backseat halfway. “But it is good to see you, Clarke,” he told her with a smile as he met her eyes in the rearview mirror.

“I’ll try not to strain the backseat with this smell,” Clarke told him in lieu of a greeting.

On the way back to Monty’s house, Clarke filled them in on everything that had happened to her, from the disastrous first practice to her meeting the principal to meeting the girl she’d bumped into. The boys nodded their heads in understanding and gave tips and advice when they could. Mostly they just joked about the smell and how much their son had grown up in these short, few days.

When they opened Monty’s door, Monroe and Fox were standing there waiting for them. Squealing in delight, Clarke barreled past Monty and Jasper and flung herself at the girls, pulling them in for hugs. “It is so good to see you guys!” Clarke exclaimed excitedly. She hadn’t expected to see them.

“Girl, you smell worse than rotten fish,” Monroe told her, plugging her nose for effect.

Turning to Monty, Clarke asked, “May I please use your shower? Let’s just get the shower out of the way first.” She had not been joking that she’d convulsed people. She was surprised Bellamy could stand to be in the same room as her. Thankfully, he hadn’t said anything to her about it.

“Follow me,” Monty nodded eagerly. He led her up to the second story and dropped her off in the bathroom. “I’ve got some clothes you can change into.” He disappeared into his room for a moment. When he returned, he said, “You can keep them until after this whole charade is over.”

“Thanks, Monty,” Clarke told him. “You’re the best.”

“I know,” he said cheekily, shutting the door behind him.

She listened to his footsteps disappear down the hall before she shucked off her clothes and turned on the water. The shower did wonders. Feeling instantly one hundred times better than before, she changed into clean clothes and hurried back downstairs to see her friends.

Monty grabbed her dirty clothes and started a load of laundry for her. He really was the best. She filled the girls in on everything they’d missed. “You know, being here makes me not want to go back,” she confessed. “Everyone thinks I’m a huge geek and a loser. I’ll never see the field against Polis.”

“Clarke, you knew this wasn’t going to be easy. Where would the fun be if you walked right in and got everything you wanted?” Monroe pointed out. “You work your butt off and you’ll get on the team.”

“I think you should ask Bellamy for pointers. He might say no, or he might give you something to work with,” Fox told her. “But you’re screwing yourself if you don’t even try.”

Sighing, Clarke plopped onto the floor in the living room, “I know you guys are right. It’s just so hard.”

“What about that girl you ran into?” Jasper asked. “She seemed cool from that little bit you’ve told us. Maybe try befriending her?” He followed her, dropping himself onto the couch above her.

Clarke nodded, “I planned on it, but I don’t even know her name, yet. And I have to be careful. I don’t need Bellamy getting the wrong idea.”

“Ah, unrequited love,” Monty mused, taking a seat on the other end of the couch.

“You should get them together. I bet Bellamy would like you then,” Monroe suggested as she and Fox came and laid down on the floor beside their friend.

“That’s actually a good idea,” Clarke admitted. She didn’t necessarily like playing matchmaker, but it would give her an excuse to talk to the girl and to get on Bellamy’s good side. Two birds with one stone.

“I have the best ones,” Monroe bragged, a large smile on her face.

“Oh! We have a present for you!” Fox cried out suddenly, startling everyone else in the room. “Sorry,” she dropped her voice an octave. “Stay here!” she hurried into another room. She was only gone for a few moments before she came back with a gift bag in hand, which she offered to Clarke.

Clarke frowned, “It’s not my birthday.” She took the bag from her friend and peered inside, but whatever was inside was obscured by tissue paper.

“Ya, well, you need it,” Fox told her with a chuckle.

Sitting up, Clarke pulled out all the tissue paper, finding two more binders at the bottom of the bag, “You guys are a lifesaver,” Clarke told them.

“Now you can have a workout binder, a good binder, and a backup for either occasion,” Monroe explained.

“You guys are seriously the best,” Clarke didn’t know how she’d get through anything in life without her amazing friends.

“As soon as your laundry’s done, we’re sending you back to school, and you’re going to kiss ass,” Monty told her. He shifted so that he could kick her gently with his foot good-naturedly.

Groaning, Clarke threw herself back onto the floor. “I think everyone is going to the diner that’s across the street from campus. They were talking about it last night.”

“Then you should go there and dazzle them with how clean you now smell,” Jasper told her, laughing at his own joke.

“They don’t want me there,” Clarke told them sadly. “I told you, they think I’m a loser. It’s dropping their reputation to be seen with me.”

“So, we just need to boost your reputation?” Monroe asked as she sat up, staring down at Clarke.

Clarke shrugged, “I have no idea how to do that.”

“What’s the one thing all jocks like to brag about?” Fox asked, seemingly catching on to whatever Monroe was getting at.

“Getting it on with the ladies,” Monty and Jasper answered at the same time. They high fived.

Clarke made a face.

“I know, it’s gross. But how else are you going to get in with these guys? It won’t be real anyway,” Jasper pointed out. That fact didn’t make it any less appealing to Clarke.

“How would I even go about that? Right before bed, tell Bellamy how much I love women?” Clarke asked with exasperation.

The group was silent for a moment before Monroe said, “Or you could show up to the diner with a couple hot babes on each arm?”

Clarke still didn’t like having to do this to get on the guys’ good sides, but it was for a good cause. The nice thing was she wasn’t actually using anyone. Everyone knew what they were getting into and the part they willingly chose to play, which made the whole ordeal better.

As Clarke walked into the diner, she looked around and spotted Bellamy sitting with Murphy and Miller, all of which were munching on a burger and fries. They hadn’t seen her, yet. Good. Gave her more time to compose herself. Taking a deep breath, she tried to steel herself for the scene that was about to unfold. She could do this. She was a dude. A hunky dude. A sexy, hunky dude. A sexy, hunky, lady’s man.

Glancing around, she saw her friends scattered around the diner in their positions. Nodding to herself, she stepped into the persona of Finn Collins and walked towards where her roommate and his friends were sitting, trying to come off as 100% more confident than she felt, her head held high.

As she neared the table, she caught Bellamy’s eye. He didn’t do anything other than shift in his seat, but Clarke got the feeling he wasn’t super thrilled to see her. That’s why she was here with her friends doing this ludacris plan. As she neared the table, she held up her hand in a mini wave, “Hey, guys.”

The boys nodded at her noncommittally. Murphy and Miller didn’t even look up at her. She grimaced to herself but stood there awkwardly as she waited for Fox to make her move.

She didn’t have to wait long.

“Finn!” came a breathless voice behind her.

Turning around, she gave Fox her fullest attention, pulling her in for a hug, “How’re you doing, baby?” Clarke asked.

Fox was wearing a short, mini, red sundress and had her hair straight with her bangs pulled up and pinned at the back of her head. She had really outdone herself. Fox looked gorgeous. Clarke let her hands wander down to her butt and pulled her in closer.

“It hasn’t been the same at school without you, Finn,” Fox told her as they pulled back, though Fox still clung to Clarke’s arm.

Clarke tried to seem regretful, “I know. I’m sorry. You know I miss you, but new school, new babe pool.” Clarke shrugged, trying to extricate herself from her friend.

“I miss you so much. I’ve been thinking a lot about you ever since you left,” Fox took Clarke’s hand and pulled her tightly against her to whisper in her ear just loud enough for the boys at the table behind them to hear, “Especially at night.” Fox made eye contact with Bellamy as she licked her lips suggestively.

Clarke could hear Bellamy clear his throat, and she kind of wished she was facing him at the moment to see what their expressions were. She could hear Murphy and Miller mumbling something, though she couldn’t hear what.

Clearing her throat, Clarke pulled away, fully out of Fox’s grasp. “It’s been great seeing you, Fox, but maybe we can catch up later?” It was time to move on to Monroe.

“Call me anytime,” Fox told her huskily before turning and walking off, Clarke and the guys all watching her go, exactly what she was going for.

Clarke leaned in to the table and mock whispered, “I’d tap that.” The boys didn’t seem at all sure of what to say. They halfheartedly smiled up at her.

Expecting Monroe at any moment, she was caught off guard when she suddenly heard a deep voice say Finn’s name. When she straightened and turned around, someone held her face between their hands and plastered their lips onto hers. It was a good thing Clarke wasn’t facing the boys because her eyes widened in shock and she tried to shove them off.

“Monroe!” Monty turned, his arm still around Clarke. “Look who I found!”

Glancing up, she found Monroe walking towards them in a very tight, leather pants and a leather crop top. High heeled stilettos and very red lipstick finished her ensemble. She wore her hair down with intricate braids scattered throughout. Fox had been beautiful. Monroe was hot, walking straight out of the pages of fantasy. Clarke had thought the outfit to be a bit over the top, but Monroe had insisted.

Using Monty as part of this scene was surprising, however. He and Jasper had just wanted to watch the drama unfold. She couldn’t imagine what would have changed his mind. Not that she was against it. It just would have been nice to have been aware.

“We were beginning to wonder if we’d ever see you again,” Monroe walked right up to Clarke, running her hand from her chest up to her shoulders.

“We had our nights of fun,” Clarke told her, looking between Monty and Monroe, putting the emphasis on multiple nights.

“If only you hadn’t transferred schools. School’s just not the same without our top gun, Finn Collins,” Monty said, squeezing Clarke’s bicep.

“Moving on to bigger and better things, guys,” Clarke told them, wrapping her arms around each of their shoulders.

“We know, we just wish we could have had one final night together to say goodbye,” Monroe said, leaning into Clarke, her mouth just inches from Clarke’s.

“I’m afraid our time together has passed,” Clarke told them sorrowfully. This was getting really weird, really fast.

“I’ll never forget you, Finn Collins,” Monty said, leaning in for one more kiss, but Clarke tilted her head, so he only kissed her cheek. She tried to look annoyed. Then Monty turned and headed for the exit.

“You know where to find me if you change your mind,” Monroe told her as she turned away. Clarke took the opportunity to slap her on the ass before she could walk away. Monroe kept walking but turned to wink at Clarke before she disappeared out the door.

When both of them were gone, Clarke turned to Bellamy, Miller, and Murphy, “Needy.” She shook her head in what she hoped they would perceive as disbelief before heading towards the back where she knew Jasper would be, probably rolling on the floor laughing.

She didn’t make it very far before she heard her name shouted again, the voice not one she immediately recognized. Before she had a chance to turn around, Jasper was walked by her and whispered, “It’s Echo!”

Freezing in place, she had a split second to decide what to do. She absolutely could not let Echo get close or she’d recognize her as the fake she was. She grabbed a menu from a table, and turned, holding it up to her face, covering the lower portion. “What do you want Echo, we’re done. Over. Stay away from me.”

“Finn!” Echo was genuinely confused, but she kept coming closer, so Clarke kept backing away from her, looking for anything to use for cover. There generally weren’t a whole lot of options for disguising yourself in a restaurant. “What are you talking about?”

“I don’t want to talk to you!” Clarke cried, hurrying between tables. This was the biggest scene she’d ever caused in her life.

“You come back her and talk to me this instant,” Echo demanded, stomping after Clarke. She was a woman on a mission, not used to being told no.

“I said we’re done. You’re hot, Echo. But the truth is you have absolutely nothing else to offer. We’re done,” Clarke grabbed a pitcher of water and threw the water onto Echo, knowing that that would stop her in her tracks. It did.

Echo couldn’t even look up. She stomped in place for a moment before hurrying out of the diner. Clarke was relieved that her cover wasn’t blown, but she did feel a little bad for how that had unfolded. She didn’t think the real Finn would be that heartbroken that he had lost his girlfriend.

Glancing around, she found she had ended up in front of the boys’ booth. “Wow,” Bellamy said, standing up and making Miller and Murphy make room for her. “That was… well, that was something!”

Clarke took a seat and reveled in the attention they were all giving her. “Sorry you guys had to see all that. Exes, am I right?” she said, trying to play this off.

“Oh, yeah. We get it,” Miller said, trying to play it off as cool.

“They can be crazy,” Murphy agreed.

“How did you know all of them?” Bellamy asked curiously, handing over some fries from his plate to Clarke.

Clarke eagerly took the food, “Mostly from my last school. Echo, I met at some social function. Wasn’t really thinking with my head when I decided to date her, if you know what I mean.”

The boys all laughed at the joke, seemingly understanding what she meant. Bellamy was giving her a weird look; a look Clarke couldn’t figure out the meaning for. He had seemed impressed she’d known them, but he didn’t always seem to like what she had to say about them all. She had been a bit over the top and dramatic. Was she going too far into the jock/bro speech? She made a point of trying to tone it down. Just because a lot of jocks seemed to only care about looks, that didn’t mean Bellamy was one of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, and I hope you guys continue to love this story just as much as I do! I so enjoy reading your comments. It brightens my whole day! Please keep telling me what you think!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the delay! But I was on vacation in sunny Arizona (Anyone from there?) and then got sick when I got back! So it's been a slow process! But I'm back!

Clarke was determined that the first day of classes would be a good one. She was semi-friends with Bellamy and by default, with Miller and Murphy. She still felt clean from her shower the day before at Monty’s. She’d stayed up the night before reading through her class list and making sure she had everything she needed, which she did. Organization and preparedness were key.

The very first class of the day was a Biology lab course. She had this class in the bag. Her mother was a director of the best hospital in Polis, and she wanted Clarke to go to college to become a doctor. All the pushing Abby did had paid off, and science classes were generally Clarke’s best subjects. Behind Art.

Art- the bane of Abby Griffin’s existence. If Clarke didn’t like art so much, she’d have no problem convincing her daughter what the right path for her was. As it was, Clarke wanted nothing to do with the medical field. Sure, she knew she’d do well, but she didn’t want to. She wanted to paint, to sketch, to mould. 

However, all of the biology classes and labs and extra tutors would pay off. Maybe Bellamy would suck and she could be his tutor, and she could use the opportunity for a little trade.

Clarke just hoped they wouldn’t have to dissect anything. Looking at internal organs wasn’t her favorite thing in the world. She could do it, but she didn’t want to. She could tell you what each of the organs were, what they were meant to do, and where they were all located. But she did not like the idea of cutting up a dead animal to look at them. 

She took a seat with Bellamy, Miller, and Murphy at a table. The boys were still chattering on about the scene she had caused at the diner the day before. Clarke wanted to put the whole mess behind her, but the boys kept finding new questions to ask her. How long had she and Echo been a thing? Where had they met? When did she know it wouldn’t work out with her anymore? Was she looking for a rebound? Anyone catch her eye?

It didn’t help that at that moment, her phone rang and she saw Roan’s name come up on the caller ID. She grabbed the phone off the desk quickly, turning it off. This was the first time Roan had called her since she’d come to Arkadia Academy. She wondered what he wanted, but she couldn’t afford to think about him at the moment. All she thought about was the look on Roan’s and Shumway’s faces when she beat them.

First she had to get on first string, and she still had no idea how exactly she was going to do that. She was still hoping Bellamy would suck at some subject that she could tutor him in exchange. She thought he’d be a typical, dumb jock, but she was beginning to wonder if there was anything typical about Bellamy Blake.

As the rest of the class filtered in and took their seats, Clarke looked around to see if there were any other familiar faces. She saw Bellamy tense up in his seat, and the boys giving him a hard time. Glancing up, Clarke saw the girl she’d bumped into outside of Principal Jaha’s office, the girl Bellamy was unrequitedly in love with. 

Just as Clarke was about to join in on the teasing, their teacher went around the room, asking everyone to draw a name out of the beaker for their lab partner for the semester. Bellamy went first, his face dropping at whoever’s name was listed on the sheet he had drawn.

Clarke reached in and grabbed her own paper, unfolding it to see the name. “Raven Reyes,” she said aloud, looking around to see who that name belonged to. Remarkably, it was the very same girl from before. 

Raven nodded at her in acknowledgement, a smile on her lips. Clarke half waved back in greeting before turning around to grab her books.

Bellamy turned to Clarke, a frown on his lips, “Do you know her?” 

“I talked to her for like a second,” Clarke answered with a shrug.

“About what?” Bellamy asked with exasperation. “She gave you the nod!” Bellamy was acting like she’d become best friends with Raven behind his back or something. 

“A good one, too,” Miller commented, earning a hard look from Bellamy. Miller put up his hands in surrender and wandered off to go find his partner. 

“Switch!” Bellamy demanded, reaching for the slip of paper, which Clarke held out of his reach.

“No!” Clarke insisted. “I said her name out loud!” Clarke got up, grabbed her books, and rushed over to sit with Raven before Bellamy could say anything else. He stared daggers into her back the entire way, and Clarke tried not to let him bother her.

As Clarke got to the table that Raven was occupying, she smiled at the young woman. “It’s nice to officially meet you.”

“Likewise,” Raven agreed, a big grin on her face.

Clarke was relieved. Raven Reyes had to be the first person on the entire campus who seemed to like her. Clarke wanted to keep it that way. Maybe they could even become friends. 

“So, I’ve got a confession to make,” Clarke whispers to her as she sets down her books and leans in closer to Raven to share her secret.

Curious, Raven leaned in to hear what she had to say.

“Dissecting animals kind of weird me out. So if you don’t mind taking the reins on this, I’d appreciate it,” Clarke told her honestly. 

“Wow- not many guys would actually admit that outloud. They’d be too macho for that,” Raven said, surprised by Clarke’s admission.

“I can do it,” Clarke insisted, getting a bit defensive. “I just don’t like to if I can help it. If it freaks you out, too, I can do it.” Raven was right, most guys were too manly to admit when things freaked them out. Blood and gore wasn’t supposed to weird out guys!

“Sorry, I wasn’t trying to say you couldn’t do it. It’s just that it’s so refreshing to hear that you’re man enough to admit it,” Raven assured her, impressed.

“Thanks,” Clarke nodded.

She reached for one of her notebooks, and as she flipped it open, a random paper fell out, fluttering to the middle of the table. Raven reached for it, and just as she picked it up, Clarke realized what they were: Finn’s song lyrics. 

“What’s this?” Raven asked as she read over it.

“Oh, nothing. I’ll just take that back,” Clarke reached for the paper, but Raven held it away from her, continuing to read.

“Wow, this is so honest. They’re beautiful,” Raven told her, her eyes searching Clarke’s. For what, Clarke wasn’t sure. 

“Just a little something I’ve been working on,” Clarke tried to laugh it off, make it seem less important than they were. She knew Finn’s lyrics were amazing. She’d been trying to tell him to use more of his songs in their setlists when they played at different venues, but he was shy and unsure of himself. So he kept writing, and Clarke kept insisting he do something with it. He always brushed it off as cousinly encouragement. 

“Well, I really liked it,” Raven told her, handing back the paper. Clarke took it thankfully and folded it up before placing it in her notebook. 

“Thanks,” Clarke smiled at her. Raven returned the smile before they delved into their assignment. 

 

After class, Clarke said her goodbyes to Raven and made her way down the hallway- off to the next class. Suddenly, she was yanked to the side, and Bellamy was practically shoving her into a study alcove where there were four chairs surrounding a table. 

Trying to pull her hand free, Clarke was shoved into one of the chairs. Unfortunately, there was no one else to witness Bellamy’s bizarre behavior. “Ow,” she rubbed her arm where Bellamy’s vise grip had been. “What the heck?”

“Did you talk to Raven about me?” he asked eagerly, and she was unsure of which answer Bellamy actually wanted.

“No,” she shook her head, and Bellamy’s face fell. “Was I supposed to?” Was this bro code that she didn’t know about?

“This is perfect. You get to see her every other morning. You can convince her to go out with me,” he told her.

Clarke scoffed. “If Raven wants to go out with you, then she’ll let you know. I’m not going to play cupid for you.” She folded her arms across her chest. 

“If you put in a good word for me and get her to go out with me, I’ll work on you with your soccer,” Bellamy told her. When he saw her hesitating, he added, “I’ll get you good enough for first string.”

Clarke narrowed her eyes at him, “By the Polis game?”

“Absolutely,” Bellamy agreed, a smiled finding its way to his face.

Thinking about the offer, Clarke wasn’t entirely sure it was a good idea to use Raven as a stepping stone to get her way on this. If she accepted Bellamy’s plan, she wouldn’t be hurting anyone. It wasn’t like she had to force Raven to go out with him. Clarke would just have to put in a good word and get her to consider him in a way she normally didn’t. No one would get hurt.

Nodding her head, Clarke held out her hand, “Deal.”

Bellamy shook her hand eagerly. “Awesome. I’ll see you at practice. I’ll stay late with you and work on a couple moves.”

Waving goodbye to Bellamy, Clarke wanted to do a double fist pump in the air. Finally things were starting to go her way.

 

* * *

Bellamy was as good as his word. After another grueling practice, at which Clarke pushed herself harder than she ever had before, Bellamy stayed behind with her and worked on a couple things. She needed to get ten times better in a short span of time. For some reason, the move Bellamy chose to teach Clarke was a harder move. Apparently, if she could master this move, it would impress coach enough to let her on first string. 

Clarke wasn’t sure how many times she fell flat on her back in the grass. Each time, Bellamy pulled her up and had her try again. He was so patient with her through the whole thing; it really impressed her. He never got angry or upset with her when she couldn’t pull off the move. It was a refreshing change from how regular practice with Coach Kane had been.

After an hour of working with Clarke, Bellamy grabbed the ball from Clarke, “Come on, let’s call it.” He started walking back towards the dorms.

Shaking her head, Clarke reached for the ball, “You go ahead. I’m going to get this move.”

There was something about the look that Bellamy gave her then that make Clarke think he was impressed with her. He threw the ball back towards her, and she set herself up once more. She missed again and again and again. It was a hard move, and it hurt when she failed. Both physically and mentally. But she kept at it. She called it when she was able to hit the ball three times in a row. It didn’t go where she wanted, but at least she hit it. Progress.

It was late by the time she got back to the dorms. She missed supper, but she had some snacks stowed away she could nibble on. Because she’d waited so long, no one had been in the showers in the locker room, and she’d been able to shower and change without anyone the wiser. 

Maybe this is where her luck finally changed and things became a bit easier for her. She could hope anyway. 

Over the next couple of days, Clarke set up a routine. She’d get up early, go to the practice field on her own and work on what Bellamy taught her the day before. She’d go to class, talk up Bellamy to Raven in lab, go to practice, stay late with Bellamy, wait until there was no one left in locker rooms before showering, then head back to the dorm and study. It worked for her. She was keeping busy, she was learning, and she was getting to know Bellamy a little more and more each day. 

Things are finally looking up, she might actually get on the first string by the Polis game at this rate. 

Bellamy stopped Clarke before class. “You aren’t holding up your end of the deal,” he told her sternly.

Clarke frowned, “What do you mean? I’m always talking about you in class. She probably thinks I want to go out with you,” Clarke joked.

The face Bellamy made shouldn’t have hurt Clarke’s feelings as much as it did. “You gotta turn it up a notch or something. I’ve been working with you every day with soccer, but Raven still won’t look twice at me.”

“I’ll see what I can do, but if she’s not interested, me pushing the topic isn’t going to help,” Clarke told him seriously. “If you like her so much, maybe you should just go up to her and tell her that.”

“I’d just screw it up,” Bellamy shook his head. It made Clarke sad that he seemed so sure that he would- there was no doubt in Bellamy’s mind that he thought he’d make the situation worse if he talked to her first. He needed Raven to make the first move.

“I’ll try again today,” Clarke promised, “But if she tells me she’s not interested, I’m done. I’m not going to keep beating a dead horse.” Clarke shifted her books in hands before walking off into the classroom. 

If Raven said she wasn’t interested and then Bellamy got mad at Clarke, that was a risk she was going to have to take. There was only so much wing-manning a person could do. She was probably scaring Raven with how much the topic of Bellamy came up. 

It wasn’t like she was constantly telling Raven that she should go out with him. She thought she’d start small and talk about how good a person he was. She didn’t even have to lie. Clarke mostly told Raven about how Bellamy was working with her on her soccer and talked about how he’d help her with her homework. Or how he’d grab her something from the cafeteria for supper since by the time she got done practicing, the cafeteria was closed. There wasn’t much else to talk up at the moment since Clarke was still getting to know him herself. 

Class was half over when Bellamy caught Clarke’s eye. Raven was telling Clarke about the different organs she was extracting, and Clarke was half listening as she thought of a non pushy way to get Raven to go out with Bellamy. When she glanced over at him, he looked insistent that she talk to Raven now.

Clearing her throat, Clarke turned her attention back to Raven, “Have you ever considered going out with Bellamy?” she asked her. Straight to the point, Clarke decided as she set down her notebook where she was writing down their findings. 

Raven looked up and frowned at Clarke, “Not really, no.” She turned her attention back to the animal in front of her, thinking the conversation was over. 

“Why not?” Clarke asked, genuinely curious. Bellamy was nice, attractive, and athletic.Most girls would be falling over themselves to be with him. A few on campus were.

Raven glanced up again, but continued trying to dislodge one of the organs. “He’s good looking, sure. But he’s just no the guy for me. Haven’t you ever looked at someone and just known you weren’t interested in them in that way?” she countered.

Of course Clarke knew that feeling, but she couldn’t admit to that out loud at the moment. “I think there’s more to Bellamy than you’re giving him credit for,” Clarke insisted.

Finally, Raven set down the scalpel and gave Clarke her full attention. “So you’re telling me he’s not another dumb jock who only wants to go out with me so he can hook up with me and brag about it to all his friends?” 

“A jock who’s too scared to treat you like an equal,” Clarke continued and then inwardly grimaced. She hadn’t meant to say that, but it was the issue she had with Roan. 

“Exactly,” Raven nodded in agreement. “See, you get it.”

“Of course I do,” Clarke sighed. “Been there, done that.”

“You know,” Raven cocked her head at Clarke, “You’re the only guy here that hasn’t tried to get into my pants.” 

“That can’t be true!” Clarke laughed. “You don’t have to worry about that from me. You’re not my type.” That was a bit of a lie. Raven was exactly Clarke’s type: beautiful and smart. But she wasn’t at this school to date anyone, and Raven was off limits anyway.

She seemed to have genuinely upset Raven, “What? Why not?”

Stumbling for words, Clarke tried to recover, “Well, uh, I just don’t think of you in that way. We’re friends.” This seemed to pacify Raven. Not wanting to leave the conversation in the weird place, Clarke admitted, “You’re one of the few people I actually feel comfortable around. Like, I can be myself with you.” 

“Likewise, Finn,” Raven agreed, smiling. “I feel the same way.”

“Good,” Clarke returned the smile. “Last time I’ll say anything about it, I promise. I just think you should take my advice and go out with Bellamy. He might surprise you.”

“I’ll consider it,” Raven said, giving Clarke a peculiar look before she picked up the scalpel and began working again, giving remarks for Clarke to write down. 

 

* * *

As Clarke made her way back to the dorms after a nice, hot shower, she felt weird about what she’d done. She felt like Raven had only said she’d consider Bellamy to get Clarke off her back. She felt badly about pushing so hard, but she had to do her favor for Bellamy as she’d promised she would. She just didn’t want to tell Bellamy that Raven said she’d consider it, but she might not actually mean it. It would hurt his feelings. And Clarke couldn’t tell him that she hadn’t said anything either because she didn’t need him thinking she was a coward who couldn’t keep her word. 

Sighing, she opened the door to their room and found Bellamy sitting at his desk, working on homework. He was oddly studious, which surprised Clarke. Most jocks she knew didn’t care so much about the academic part of school. 

Roan sure didn’t. Usually Clarke would let him copy off of her assignments. She used to try to teach him, but he never was interested and didn’t pay any attention and ended up copying anyway. Reason number 14658791 why he had been such a bad boyfriend. 

Bellamy glanced up as Clarke came in, and she headed right for the bed. Throwing her duffel bag towards her closet, she let gravity take her as she fell onto her bed backwards. “Long day?” Bellamy asked before turning back to his homework.

“You could say that,” Clarke agreed as she stared intently at the ceiling. 

Several moments of silence descended on them. Bellamy broke it, asking, “Did you get to talk to Raven at all?” He said it so nonchalantly. Clarke wondered how hard it was for him to distance himself and act like it wouldn’t bother him one way or the other.

Turning her head to face Bellamy, Clarke took a couple seconds to weigh her options one more time. “So, I got her to agree to consider you,” she started.

Before she could continue, Bellamy was fist pumping and beaming at her. Beaming! His smile transformed his entire face. She hadn’t seen this genuine of a smile from him before; she was loath to get rid of it. “You’re the man!” Bellamy told her, fist pumping excitedly in his seat. It was endearing and a little weird to watch him freak out. 

When he’d calmed down, he turned to her, “So I should go ask her out tomorrow, do you think?” he asked.

“What?” Clarke shook her head furiously, “No! You have to have a normal conversation with her first! You can’t just ask someone on a date out of the blue!” 

Groaning, Bellamy let his head flop backwards onto the chair. “I’m not good at this.”

“What? At talking to girls?” Clarke asked for clarification. When Bellamy nodded, she continued, “Why? You’re hot?” 

When Bellamy’s head shot up and gave a her a weird look, Clarke’s stomach dropped. Why did she say the most awkward things around him. “What?” he asked with a grimace. He was almost getting used to the weird things she said and did.

“I just mean you have a very approachable facade. And girls aren’t that scary. This shouldn’t be that hard,” Clarke told him honestly happy with how she’d covered up her fumble. He seemed to be thinking about what she had said. 

“What should I go talk to her about?” he asked seriously.

“Literally anything. You could talk about school- you are in the same lab class together. You could bond with her over your friendship with me,” Clarke tried, hoping to make Bellamy smile. 

“My first conversation with Raven is not going to be about another guy,” he told her without even cracking a smile. 

Nodding in understanding, Clarke tried again, “Well, you don’t know much about her, right? Ask what she does on the weekends? Or what she likes to do in her spare time? Seriously, just pick a topic and go with it. Confidence is key.”

“Easy for you to say,” Bellamy mumbled. 

“You think it’s easy for me to talk to people I like?” Clarke asked. 

Bellamy nodded.

“Come on, let’s practice. I’ll be Raven, and you be you,” Clarke told him as she made her way to the other side of the room. As she walked closer to Bellamy, she stopped and said in her normal, girl voice, “Hi, I’m Raven.”

Bellamy chuckles, “You know, that’s a great impersonation. You sound just like a girl.”

Clarke shrugs, “I used to imitate my cousin a lot. Drove her nuts.” Clarke grabbed Bellamy’s hand and pulled him to his feet, ignoring how big his hand was compared to hers. “Come on, play along.” She stepped back and pretended to flip her imaginary long hair over her shoulder.

“Hey, Raven. How about that weather we’re having?” Bellamy tried, a smile tugging at his lips.

“It’s nice,” Clarke said shortly, hoping Bellamy would keep going with another topic.

“Raven wouldn’t be that rude to me,” Bellamy pointed out.

“Well, you’re not talking to the real Raven,” Clarke told him. “You’re talking to me, and we’re going to prepare you to talk to any girl. Not just Raven.”

Frowning, Bellamy didn’t seem to like that, but he sighed and tried again, “Do you ever watch soccer?” 

Clarke side eyed him, “I hate soccer.” Then she turned her nose up and looked away from him.

“What do you like to do?” Bellamy asked.

Turning and facing Bellamy, Clarke answered, “I love drawing, useless trivia facts, and pasta.” All were very much true about Clarke, none were particularly true about Raven.

“Have you been that place on Tenth Avenue?. They have trivia nights and pasta,” Bellamy asked, his hand shot up and ran through his unruly hair. A nervous tick, Clarke noted.

“And that’s how it’s done,” Clarke told him, her boy voice back in place. “See, that was easy. You just talked to a girl.”

“It’ll be different when it’s actually me and her.,” Bellamy informed her.

Clarke shrugged, “Ya, but at least now we know you can actually do it if you put your mind to it.”

Suddenly, the phone started ringing, and grabs their attention.Clarke move over to the phone but then thought better of it. It could any one of Finn’s family that would know she wasn’t him. So she let it hit the voicemail. The voice of Abby Griffin came over the line and Clarke’s heart dropped. Had she discovered what she’d done?

“Finn, dear, it’s Abby. I’m just calling to remind you of the carnival tomorrow! You had promised you’d be there. We look forward to seeing you and Clarke.”

Clarke groaned, “I had completely forgotten about the carnival.”

“You’re mom’s a debutante? So’s mine. I’ll be there, too. We can go together,” Bellamy suggested. “And Raven will be there, so it’ll be a perfect opportunity.”

Clarke plopped back down on the bed. “Great. You’ll be there, and so will Raven, Roan, Echo, and my mom. Wonderful.” She was going to have to figure out how to be both Clarke and Finn all day so that she could prove they’d both been there. She’d have an ex on each side to deal with.Not to mention steering clear of her mother as Finn. “I need some air. I’ll be back.”

With that, Clarke got up, grabbed her cellphone and dorm keys and hurried out of the room, pressing Monty’s number. 

“What fire do we need to put out today?” Monty asked in lieu of a greeting.

“Oh just the carnival tomorrow,” Clarke answered as she made her way down the hall towards the doors, dodging some of the guys that were walking back in towards their rooms..

“Oh shit, that’s tomorrow already?” Monty asked, his voice a bit panicky.

“Yeah. How am I supposed to be Finn and Clarke tomorrow and deal with both Echo and Roan? It’s going to be a disaster. As if one ex isn’t enough!” She reached the door and pushed it open, relishing the cool air on her warm skin. 

“We’ll figure it out. I’ll have Monroe grab you some clothes to change into for when you can be a girl. And we’ll try to keep your mom off of you as much as we can. But I’m not sure how to help with the whole exes thing.” How did she get such good friends in this life? They seriously went above and beyond what any normal friends would do. 

“That’s the biggest problem.” Clarke turned down the sidewalk and just walked out of earshot of anyone with an open window.

“Maybe Echo won’t even bother you. I mean, she did get pretty embarrassed the last time she saw you. Maybe she’ll still be nursing her wounds.”

“We can only hope. Can we just make sure Monroe or Fox s is assigned the same booth as me? Or ones that are close by?”

“You know your mom better than anyone. Do you think she’d let that work?” 

“Probably not. There’s not enough volunteers to do that.”

“Look, we’ll make it work. Jasper and I aren’t in your fancy league, so we can kind of stake out and help out where needed, okay?” Monty sounded so sure. “We’ll figure it out.”

Nodding her head, Clarke tried to believe it, “You’re right. We will.”

“You’re Clarke Fucking Griffin. You got this.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys again for your lovely comments. I truly look forward to reading them every time I post a new chapter!   
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter!


	6. Chapter 6

When Clarke awoke the following morning, it was with a pit of dread and anxiety coiling up tightly in her abdomen. She’d barely slept more than a couple hours as her brain wouldn’t stop thinking of all the horrible things that could go wrong today.

Taking a deep breath, she made herself focus on the positives. She’d be able to be herself, Clarke, for a little bit today. She’d get to enjoy being off campus and seeing her friends. It was a carnival, so that meant she’d get to eat delicious carnival food.

Yes. She could do this.

Reaching across the bed for her phone, she unplugged it from the charger and texted the group:  **It’s Do or Die Day.**

**Stop being so dramatic,** Fox’s replied immediately.

**We got this!** Monroe said.

**We got the goods. We’re ready for the exchange.** Jasper assured her, referring to her clothes.

**Sounds like we’re dealing drugs now.** Monty commented.

**Once we start dealing drugs, I’m out, Fox** told them.

**If I have to resort to dealing drugs, I think you guys need to pull me out of school and make me reevaluate my life choices.** Clarke replied.

**We can have an intervention** , Jasper said.

**See you guys at the carnival,** Clarke smiled as she set her phone back down on the bed and stared at the ceiling for a few moments longer. She forced herself to count slowly to ten to try and settle down her fluttering heart.

Finally, she forced herself to get up, and she dressed for the day. By the time she finished, Bellamy was getting up and changing, too. He said they could go together, but she doubted she’d be spending all that much time with him throughout the day, which was too bad. She was beginning to actually enjoy hanging out with Bellamy Blake. She’d wondered if the day would ever come.

After grabbing breakfast in the cafeteria together, Bellamy and Clarke headed to the carnival. Bellamy had a vehicle, so he drove the two of them. It was an old, beater car -not the typical car seen at Arkadia Academy. The people that did have cars all had something newer- from the last 5 years. Clarke was sure this car was from the 1990s at least.

“I didn’t know you had a car,” Clarke commented as she buckled her seatbelt.

Bellamy shrugged, “I know it’s nothing pretty, but it gets me from point A to point B.” He adjusted his rearview mirror and backed out of his spot.

“Do you like to fix up old cars?” Clarke asked him, wondering if that was why he had such an old car. She hoped he wouldn’t start talking to her about cars. She knew nothing about cars.

Shaking his head, Bellamy answered, “Not really. My family doesn’t come from money like a lot of the people at Arkadia. This is my mom’s old car.”

Frowning, Clarke asked, “Isn’t tuition pricey? How do you afford it?” Clarke couldn’t help the curiosity in her voice.

Bellamy was quiet for a few moments, as if debating what to say. Finally, he said, “Soccer. The school recruited me. You can’t really do that in high school, so not many people know. They told me they’d give me free room and board if I play for them.”

Nodding her head in understanding, Clarke replied, “That’s a pretty sweet deal then.”

“Just don’t advertise that. If it gets out, the school will drop me in a heartbeat. We don’t all come from money like you.” Bellamy played off the last sentence like it was a joke, but a part of Clarke thought he meant it.

“What makes you think I come from money?” Clarke asked nonchalantly.

“Your clothes, your stuff, just the way you carry yourself,” he answered equally nonchalant. “You’re too confident for someone so klutzy. I just guessed, but you’re confirming it.”

Clarke nodded her head, but she stayed quiet for a moment to collect her thoughts. What did you say to something like that? He wasn’t wrong, of course. She did come from money. She’d led an exceptionally privileged life compared to most.

“My mom doesn’t like word getting out that we don’t have a lot of money. To her, appearance is everything. As long as we look the part, no one will look real closely at where we live or the old, beat up cars we have.  It’s why I have to help out at the carnival today. My sister will be around helping my mom, too. It’s all for show,” Bellamy told her, and for the first time, Clarke heard resentment in his voice. Obviously, things weren’t perfect at home for Bellamy.

“Me showing up is for appearances, too,” Clarke assured him. “My mom thinks it’s important we look and act as important as possible. I need to show up, so it looks like we’re the perfect family. It’s all just posturing.”

Glancing at her, Bellamy looked surprised. It turned out the two weren’t nearly as different as they both had thought. “Looks like we both have some family issues, huh?” Bellamy gave her a small smile.

Returning the smile, Clarke agreed, “Seems like it.”

When she turned to look out the window, she saw they were pulling into the parking lot of the carnival. Here we go. Grabbing her phone, she sent a quick text to the group to tell them she was there and that she’d meet them at the bathrooms.

“Do you know what booth you’ll be working?” Bellamy asked her as they rounded the car and headed towards the entrance of the carnival. It was early, but there were already a lot of people milling about.

Clarke shook her head, “I got to find my mo-aunt! And see where she wants me.” Crap, Abby was Finn’s aunt. Stupid mix-up, but thankfully, it wasn’t that big of a deal. She just needed to be careful.

“Alright. I got to find my mom and see where I’m supposed to be, too,” he replied, looking around.

She was looking around, too, keeping an eye out for Echo or Roan specifically. They were the ones she needed to make sure didn’t see her. She caught sight of Echo walking ahead of them. Shit. She needed to go get changed ASAP. It would be safer to be Clarke than Finn. “I’ll catch up with you later!” Clarke called out before dashing out of sight.

Hurrying towards the bathrooms, she tried to duck between attractions and booths. As she got closer, she heard a voice behind her. Turning to look, she found Echo rushing after her, calling for Finn. Clarke cursed; she should have kept a better eye on Echo. She saw Monty and Jasper talking to each other ahead of her, and she made a beeline for them.

“Echo’s right behind me! What do I do?” she hissed as she came up to them, startling Monty, which she would normally have enjoyed in other circumstances. The boys were always scaring her, but she rarely could get the jump on them.

They both looking behind her to assess the situation. “Shit,” said Monty as he looked around for viable options.

“Head off in a direction and we’ll distract her,” Jasper pushed her off down one of the paths, handing off a bag as he did.

Clarke ran as fast as her legs would let her. She was sure she looked stupid running like she was, but she couldn’t afford to get caught. She found a porta potty and changed as quickly as she could, holding her breath from the stench.

The sundress Monroe and Fox had packed for her was one of her favorites. It was a red halter top dress that fell to the knees. It was one of Clarke’s favorite dresses. She pulled off the wig and ran a brush through her hair. They’d stuffed deodorant at the bottom of the bag blessedly, and as she exited the porta potty, she dabbed the deodorant under her armpits.

It was refreshing to be Clarke Griffin again, if only for a little bit. She knew she needed to find her mother and try to cover for where Finn would be. She took her time strolling through the many booths and stands, enjoying the fresh air and the freedom she was feeling. She wasn’t sure where her friends were, but she knew they had to be around; she hoped Echo wasn’t giving Monty and Jasper too much trouble.

“Clarke!” she heard her mother call. “I’m pleasantly surprised to see you made it. And mostly on time.”

Smiling, Clarke hugged her mom quickly. “I told you I’d be here. Where do you want me?”

“You’re going to be at the kissing booth,” Abby told her, reading off the clipboard in front of her. She grimaced when she read it and held up a hand to silence Clarke. “I know it’s not ideal, but I didn’t make up this list. You’re gonna have to go switch now, she’s been there all morning.”

Sighing in defeat, Clarke shrugged. It wasn’t the worst thing she could be doing. There was always being in charge of the bathrooms or something equally disgusting. “Alright.”

“Where’s Finn? Didn’t you guys come together?” Abby asked, looking around as if that would make him magically appear before her.

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Mom, he’s probably hiding out somewhere. You know he loves this stuff just as much as I do,” the sarcasm dripped off of every word.

“Well, go find him and tell him he’s supposed to help out with the bouncy house in two hours,” Abby told her, shooing her away so she could go give directions to other poor, unfortunate souls.

Clarke wanted to whine about the unfairness, but she didn’t have a chance because her mother was hurrying away, seeing something not in its proper place. Defeated, she turned and thought of her best course of action. She needed to go to the kissing booth. She could figure out how she was going to pose as Finn at the bouncy house later.

Shifting her bag on her shoulder, she turned and headed off in the direction her mother had pointed her. There was a long line of boys of all ages spilling off of a small stage, which was the makeshift kissing booth. A dark-haired beauty was sitting on a chair, accepting money for a brief kiss on the lips. She looked about as happy as Clarke felt.

Tapping the young lady on the shoulder, Clarke said, “You’ve been relieved.” As glanced up at who the first boy in line was. It was Bellamy. Shocked, she turned so he couldn’t get a good look at her face just yet.

The girl on the chair stood up quickly, and Clarke saw it was Raven. Could the day throw any more surprises her way? “Thank god you’re here,” she whispered, leaning closer to Clarke. “If I had to kiss that old man one more time, I was going to freak.”

“Thanks,” Clarke laughed. “Something to look forward to.”

“Sorry,” Raven said, not sounding sorry at all. “Most of it hasn’t been too bad. Just be careful. The kid likes to slip in his tongue.”

Nodding, Clarke glanced up over at the kid Raven mentioned, “I appreciate the warning.” The thought made her want to gag, but she schooled her features neutrally.

“No problem,” Raven smiled and made her way out the back of the stage. “Good luck!” she called over her shoulder.

Taking a deep breath, Clarke stepped forward to take her place in the chair. She heard Bellamy curse under his breath, and she decided to have some fun with him, “Sorry I’m such a disappointment.”

“What?” Bellamy’s head snapped up as he walked up the steps to take his seat in the chair opposite her. She could see his cheeks turn red from embarrassment.  “I didn’t mean anything bad about you. I’m sorry. You look amazing; you’re beautiful,” he was rambling and stumbling for words, but Clarke found it cute.

“Well, thanks,” Clarke smiled at him, running a hand through her hair. She could hear the people in line making snarky remarks, so she cleared her throat and said, “If you want a kiss, you’re going to have to pay for it first.”

“Oh, right,” Bellamy reached into his pocket and pulled out the money, handing it over.

Suddenly, Clarke felt self-conscious. This was her roommate, who had no idea who she was. She’d be kissing her roommate. Would he like it? Would she? Kissing him would cross a line she wouldn’t be able to come back from. After this, she would know what his lips tasted like, what his breath was like, if he was a good or bad kisser. She’d know things about Bellamy she probably shouldn’t as his roommate.

This was for charity. She couldn’t possibly turn him down. And as he held her gaze, Clarke wanted nothing more to find out what kissing Bellamy Blake would be like. He was leaning forward slightly, waiting for her to meet him. She hesitated for only a moment before surging forward.

Kissing Bellamy Blake was something Clarke hadn’t even known she wanted. When their lips met, it was soft and tentative. Neither sure if the other wanted to go further. Finally, Clarke decided to just go for it, and she opened her mouth, her tongue darting out. She felt more than heard a satisfied humming from Bellamy. She never wanted to stop.

“Do we all get to make out with you if pay extra?” came a voice behind Bellamy, and he pulled back. Clarke wanted to murder whoever just interrupted them.

Thankfully, Bellamy’s face was still about an inch away from hers, and he seemed just as loathe to stop as she was. “That’s probably five dollars’ worth, right?” he asked.

“No, you get a little longer,” Clarke assured him as she reached up to pull him back down to her.

Just as their lips touched, they were wrenched apart suddenly. Clarke nearly fell out of her chair. When she had her bearings, she saw Roan standing in front of her, looking hurt and angry. Bellamy was on the ground just as confused as she was.

“Roan, what the hell?” Clarke asked, shooting to her feet. She wanted to help Bellamy up, but Roan grabbed her arm.

“Clarke, I came here to talk to you,” Roan told her, his eyes pleading with her to listen.

Shaking her head, she tried to push around him. Bellamy was getting to his feet on his own and stood behind Roan. “This is a kissing booth for charity. I don’t know what your deal is,” Bellamy told him.

That kiss wasn’t for charity, Clarke thought. That had been all for her. Every blissful second.

“My deal is you’re making out with my girlfriend,” Roan said, spinning on his heels to face Bellamy. Roan was bigger than Bellamy, and he intimidated many people. Bellamy was not one of them.

“Ex-girlfriend,” Clarke yelled at him, trying to get between the two boys. Looking at Roan, she said, “You need to leave.”

“You heard her,” Bellamy told Roan.

“I don’t have to do anything you say,” Roan replied.

“I think you should listen to what your ex-girlfriend tells you,” Bellamy countered with extra emphasis on the ex-girlfriend.

“You boys are acting like children. Stop,” Clarke exclaimed. “Roan, just go.”

“Roan?” Bellamy furrowed his brows for a second before his face lit up, “The Roan I made cry last year? From Polis?” Then something else clicked in his mind, “Are you Finn Collin’s cousin?” he asked Clarke, there was an edge to his voice she wasn’t sure what it meant.

Before Clarke could reply, Roan was answering, “I wasn’t crying. I had something in my eye.”

“Oh, right,” Bellamy nodded in mock understanding, a smug smirk on his face.

That smugness usually made Clarke’s blood pressure rise. Apparently, that was just how everyone reacted. Roan looked like he was going to punch him. Instead, he tackled him out of the booth. Everyone in line gasped in surprise, but Clarke ignored them as she raced out of the booth to try and salvage the situation.

The boys were scrambling to their feet, and Bellamy took a swing at Roan, connecting with his cheek. He barely had time to revel in his success before Roan kicked Bellamy backwards, causing him to stumble into a popcorn cart, spilling the contents onto the ground.

Clarke jumped up onto Roan’s back, pulling him back and away from Bellamy as best as she could. It wasn’t easy, and it really didn’t do anything. Roan was still lunging for Bellamy, Clarke hanging on tightly to his back. When she figured that wasn’t working, Clarke let go, dropping gracefully to her feet behind Roan, who was grateful to no longer be grappled.

In two fluid motions, Clarke kicked the back of Roan’s knee, causing him to drop to one knee, and then shoved him to the ground as hard as she could, onto his ass. As she loomed over him, she shouted, “That’s enough!”

The quiet that settled around them was unsettling, and Clarke looked up. Her mother, Jasper, and Monty were hurrying towards her, mouths gaping. Bellamy was behind her, and Clarke was scared to look at him and see what expression he was making. The line of people that had been lined up to the kissing booth had fanned out into a half circle, watching with rapt attention. She saw a couple of the other debutante’s mothers looking on with horrified looks on their faces.

Clarke would have been embarrassed if she weren’t so damned impressed with herself for the slick maneuvering she’d just pulled. Stepping away from Roan, she stood there waiting for her mother’s lecture. She didn’t have to wait long.

Jasper and Monty stayed back, but they gave her a thumbs up, looking very proud and impressed. Her mother seemed less than impressed. “Clarke Griffon. What were you thinking?” Abby looked at the two boys. Bellamy was looking down, shamefully. Roan was getting up and dusting himself off, looking as though this wasn’t the first time it’d happened.

“I was thinking it was unbecoming for two gentlemen to be fighting,” she batted her eyelashes in what she hoped was a charming and delicate manner at her mother. When her mother didn’t crack a smile, she shrugged, dropping all pretense, “I don’t see what the big deal is, I stopped him.”

“The big deal is you’ve made a spectacle of yourself,” Abby angry whispered at her. Then turning to the crowd, she said, “The kissing booth will be down until further notice. Please enjoy the rest of the carnival!”

People only grumbled slightly before dispersing. Clarke made eye contact again with Bellamy before his mother came over and pulled him away and out of sight. Sighing in defeat, she turned back to her mom, “Did you want me to just let them have at it while I continued the kissing booth?”

“Of course not. I’m more upset with Roan and Bellamy than I am with you. I know you were just trying to help,” Abby told her, looking almost nonchalant now, as they walked back through the carnival.

Frowning, Clarke deflated. She hadn’t thought her mom would have been understanding, “That’s actually very surprising. I was expecting you to be mad at me.”

Abby gave her a look, “Quite the opposite. You showed them no one should mess with Clarke Griffin. How can I be mad about that?”

Clarke smiled. She and her mother didn’t always get along, but she was sure glad her mom could be so understanding.

“I’m going to assign you somewhere else. Please don’t get in any more fights today, okay? The other mothers are all going to be talking enough as it is,” Abby told her, stopping in front of another booth. She gave Clarke a quick hug and left her to it.

Letting out a deep breath, Clarke couldn’t believe her day. She’d kissed her roommate and realized she wanted to do it again and again. How could she go back to Arcadia and act like nothing had happened?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, I can't thank you guys enough for your words of encouragement. I look forward to hearing what you all have to say after each chapter!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I'm back!

When Clarke opened the door to her and Bellamy’s dorm room, she was apprehensive to say the least. She wanted desperately to talk to him about what had happened earlier that day. Had he enjoyed the kiss as much as she had? Did he want to do it again? What did he think of her? Did he even think of her? Would today just be a funny story for him to tell people later?

How could she expect him to give her an answer when she wasn’t entirely sure herself? The feelings had come on all at once, and she wasn’t sure what to do with them now or where to go from here. It was thrilling and scary all at the same time.

Just a couple weeks ago, she’d been in love with Roan. They’d been happy together. It may not have been the healthiest relationship ever as he clearly hadn’t considered Clarke his equal. But she never would have thought this was where she’d be now.

Ever since she came to Arkadia, she’d been searching for Bellamy’s approval, doing and saying things to get him to open up to her and get him to be her friend. She wondered if he considered them friends now or if he still considered her the annoying roommate. She felt as though they were friends- not best friends. You can’t be best friends with someone you’re lying to on a daily basis.

Now that she knew she liked Bellamy- like liked him- she wondered how she hadn’t figured it out sooner. Her heart beat more quickly whenever he was close. She’d just been chalking it up to nerves. She felt herself smiling whenever she looked at him. Her heart felt happy when they were hanging out and just relaxing, watching a movie, or doing homework. It was the epitome of a high school crush.

She was pathetic.

She was back to being Finn Collins, and she couldn’t ask Bellamy any of the questions swirling through her head. Clarke had no idea how to broach the topic with Bellamy. She decided to let it up to Bellamy. If he brought it up, she’d be more than happy to discuss it with him. If he didn’t say anything, well, she could live with that, too.

If he said something, it was a sign he liked Clarke. But if he didn’t, well, at least she’d know now that he wasn’t interested. Easier to shut off those feelings now before they got worse.

Taking a deep breath, Clarke steeled herself before opening their door. He was sitting at his desk, a textbook open in front of him, and he was taking notes into his notebook with one hand and holding an ice pack to his side with his other hand. He looked a little worse for wear, tired and exhausted.

Channeling her inner Finn, she strode into the room. “What’s with the ice pack?” she asked, throwing her bag onto the bed before plopping down beside it.

Bellamy’s head shot up quickly as though she’d startled him. Clarke frowned. Why he was so edgy? “Where did you disappear to? I tried to call you, but you wouldn’t answer. I waited for like an hour before I came back here.”

“Sorry, my ex showed up, and I ended up hiding out all day. I tried to find you, but we must have just missed each other,” Clarke answered. Her lies were becoming more fluid and less hard to come up with. She’d like to believe that she was beginning to sound more believable, too.

She wasn’t so sure this was a good thing.

Letting out a deep breath, Bellamy turned back to his homework without saying anything.

Standing up, Clarke walked over to his desk, stopped just short of his chair. “What happened?”

“I don’t want you to freak out,” Bellamy told her without looking up. He was sitting very rigid in his seat, staring intently at the open book in front of him.

“Okay,” Clarke wasn’t real sure where he was going with this. She took a step back and waited patiently for Bellamy to say whatever was eating at him.

“I met your cousin today,” Bellamy finally said. “And I ended up getting into a fight with her ex-boyfriend.”

“Why would I freak out about that? Roan’s a tool who needed to be put in his place,” Clarke shrugged before going back over to the bed and sitting on the edge.

Turning in his seat, Bellamy faced Clarke. “Well, the thing is, Roan and I started fighting because he caught me kissing her,” Bellamy said gently. When he saw Clarke about to say something, he hurriedly added, “It was for charity! A good cause!”

“Hey, if you want to kiss my cousin, you go ahead and kiss her. As much as you want,” Clarke told him encouragingly.

“Really?” Bellamy seemed dubious.

“I mean, you’re both consenting adults. I’m not going to tell you what you can and can’t do. You’re a good friend to me. Why would I have a problem with it?” Clarke answered with a shrug. She never had understood why people got bent out of shape when their friends dated their siblings or other family members. If your friend was a good person, wouldn’t you want them to be together?

“Wow. I have to admit if you’d kissed my sister, I wouldn’t have been this okay with it,” Bellamy confessed, his brows were furrowed as he leaned back in his chair.

“What? Why?” Clarke asked with a frown. “What’s wrong with me?”

Bellamy gave her a look. “It’s just that no one is going to be good enough in my eyes to be with my sister.”

Clarke narrowed her eyes, “It’s that kind of thinking that will only push her to date the bad boys.”

“Or it’ll teach her to keep her standards higher,” Bellamy countered.

“Right,” Clarke held her hands up in defeat. “So, ya, so if you want to call Clarke, I can give you her number,” Clarke suggested, eager to get back to the topic at hand.

“That’d be great!” Bellamy pulled out his phone and put in the phone number Clarke rattled off to him. “Should I ask her out?”

Clarke nodded her head vigorously. “Definitely think you should.”

Bellamy smiled, nodding as he got up and laid down on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. “But what about Raven?” Bellamy asked. “Raven’s great, and I’ve liked her for a long time. I’ve been working up to asking her out. But your cousin, Clarke, is cool, too. The way she took down her ex was so badass.”

Clarke shifted so she was facing Bellamy’s bed. “What does your heart tell you?” Clarke asked.

Turning his head to look at her, he gave her a weird look, “What?”

Clearing her throat, Clarke shuffled back onto the bed so that her back was against the wall, and she pulled a pillow onto her lap, “I mean, uh, which one would you rather see naked?”

Sitting up quickly, Bellamy gave her a disgusted look. “You need to stop talking like that. There are sometimes when I think you’re pretty cool. And then other times you make these weird, vulgar remarks about women. It’s weird and not okay.”

Cringing, Clarke stayed quiet, staring into her lap. “If you couldn’t tell,” she said, “I’m not very good at bonding with you guys. I’m sorry. Sometimes, things just come out.” It wasn’t a very good excuse she knew, but it was the best she could do. She was pleasantly surprised by Bellamy’s reaction. She didn’t like saying the things she did. It was nice to know Bellamy wasn’t like that. She’d be lying if she said she wasn’t embarrassed however.

“Just stop,” he told her, shaking his head disappointedly as he laid back down.

“You’re more emotional and sentimental than I would have given you credit for,” Clarke admitted.

He shrugged his shoulders, “I just feel like you have better relationships when you make a connection with someone and aren’t in it just for the sex. Don’t get me wrong, the physical stuff is good, too. Great, even. But if I want a girlfriend, I want more than just sex.”

“It takes a mature person to know what they want and not to settle for less,” Clarke told him, impressed. This Bellamy was completely different from the Bellamy she had first met. Or at least, her perception of him had completely changed.

Bellamy exchanged a smile with her before he got up and headed to his closet, “I’m gonna grab a shower.” He grabbed his stuff and was gone from the room.

Clarke stared after him. If Raven only knew this version of Bellamy Blake, she’d completely change her tune. He wasn’t some shallow jock only out to get into her pants. He was probably exactly what Raven was looking for in a guy. She wondered why Raven wouldn’t at least give him a chance. Clarke would be lucky to end up with someone half as nice.

She wondered what it would be like for Bellamy to pine after her like he did for Raven. Raven was awesome: smart, beautiful, funny. She had all the best qualities. Meanwhile, Clarke was a liar and quirky at best. She didn’t doubt that she could be pretty- if she ever chose to care about it. But she was more interested in soccer than anything else.

It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out which girl Bellamy would pick. She knew she shouldn’t compare herself to Raven. They were both awesome in their own way. It wasn’t Raven’s fault Bellamy had a massive crush on her. And she wasn’t resentful of Raven. She was just frustrated with her situation.

Thankfully, she wouldn’t have to keep up the rouse for too much longer. The big game was coming up in less than a week. Then she’d go back to Polis and her friends, and she’s completely forget about Bellamy Blake, and his amazingly beautiful brown eyes and his oh so kissable lips.

Banging her head on the wall, she slumped down into bed, groaning. Reaching for her phone, she opened her text messages and debated who she could talk to about this. Monty and Jasper would just tell her to not pursue Bellamy- it wouldn’t make sense to try for something that was doomed to fail. Monroe and Fox would probably tell her to go for it.

She didn’t know if she wanted to be encouraged or talked out of it. She put her phone back on her night table. She decided she didn’t really want to have to go into what was going on in her brain. She decided to let things sort out themselves.

* * *

The next morning, Clarke was in the weight room with the soccer team. She had gotten partnered up with Bellamy and was currently his spotter. She tried not to focus on the muscles of his chest as he bench pressed. He was wearing a flimsy tank top that did little to cover up his upper body, but Clarke wasn’t complaining.

Miller and Murphy were at the next machine over, haggling each other, and Clarke tried to ignore them and focus on Bellamy. She needed to be ready in case he needed help finishing a rep. Again, she found herself distracted by watching those pectoral muscles firing under the strain of the weight.

As soon as Bellamy finished the set, Clarke moved over to a leg machine and began working her quads. She needed some distance between the two of them at the moment.

“So, I was thinking about calling your cousin, Clarke, today,” Bellamy told her as he grabbed a towel and wiped the sweat from his face.

“Really?” Clarke’s face lit up, and she nearly lost her footing with the weights.

“Ya,” Bellamy nodded with a smile as he took out his phone.

“Collins!” Coach Kane’s voice stopped Clarke in her tracks as she was slinking off, so she could go answer the phone when Bellamy made the call.

Turning around, she stood rigidly straight and waited for Coach to say his peace. “You’re gonna be first string for the game against Polis this week,” Kane told her as he came to stand in front of her.

Clarke felt like her heart rose into her throat. “Coach,” she wasn’t sure what to say. “Thank you!”

“Keep up the good work,” he told her before walking back out of the room.

She managed to keep the excitement contained until after Coach Kane left the room. Then, she was fist pumping in the air. “YES!” she cried.

“Congrats, Finn,” Bellamy told her, patting her on the shoulder.

“It’s all because of you!” Clarke told him. “I made first string!” She jumped up on Bellamy without thinking and wrapped her arms around him in a hug.

Bellamy hugged her back for a moment, but Clarke held on for longer than was socially acceptable. Bellamy was struggling to pull away. “Okay,” Bellamy shoved Clarke’s hands off of him, and he took a step back. “I told you I could get you to first string before the Polis game.”

Nodding her head, Clarke beamed at him, unable to stop smiling. “You’re right. I really owe you one.”

“If your cousin agrees to go out with me, we can call ourselves even,” Bellamy assured her as he reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone.

“Hey, boys,” Raven’s voice cut through the euphoria that Clarke was feeling.

Clarke turned her smiling face towards her friend, “Hey, Raven. What’s up?”

“Actually, I’m here to talk to Bellamy,” Raven told her coldly, blowing past her.

Frowning, Clarke turned and watched in horror as Raven went right up to Bellamy and started flirting with him. She wasn’t catching everything Raven was saying, but she knew Raven was laying it on thick, making Bellamy completely forget about Clarke Griffin.

“Raven,” Clarke cleared her voice, coming over to the two of them. “What are you doing?” Clarke cast a glance at Bellamy. He was gazing happily at Raven. Raven had him wrapped around her finger.

“Oh, I was just asking Bellamy out to dinner tonight,” Raven told her innocently. There was a challenge in her eyes that Clarke didn’t understand.

Changing tactics, Clarke turned her attention to Bellamy. “Weren’t you about to make a phone call?” she asked him.

“I can worry about that later,” he said, blowing her off.

Angry, Clarke walked over to her bag, grabbed her phone, and dialed Bellamy’s number. Clarke watched as Bellamy looked surprised at his phone before answering, apologizing to Raven.

“Hello?” came his deep voice.

“Bellamy?” Clarke went back into Clarke mode. “This is Clarke. We met at the carnival?” Glancing back over at him, she saw that Raven was stepping closer and saying something to him.

Bellamy swallowed, his adam’s apple bobbing. “Right. I remember.”

“Well, Finn gave me your number. I was wondering if you’d like to get together?” she asked in her most innocent and sweet voice she could muster.

“Oh, um, right,” Bellamy’s voice was distracted, and Clarke knew he wasn’t paying her any attention. So, she hung up. She didn’t want to talk to Bellamy like this. She supposed she should let him be with Raven. It’s what he’d been wanting long before she walked into his life.

She watched as Bellamy put the phone back in his pocket without a second glance. Raven said something else to him before spinning on her heels and heading back over to the treadmill she had been running on. Bellamy had a stupid grin on his face that Clarke did not find endearing at all.

Narrowing her eyes, she followed Raven back across the weight room. “Raven, what are you doing?” Clarke asked her, trying not to let her emotions take over.

“I’m just taking your advice,” Raven shrugged, her ponytail flipping over her shoulder.

“You told me you don’t like Bellamy like that,” Clarke reminded her.

“Well, feelings can change, Finn. Besides, did you see him in that tank top?” Raven fanned herself with her hand as she glanced back over to Bellamy.

“I thought you didn’t like Bellamy because you thought he was shallow. Now you’re doing the same thing to him, Raven. He’s not an object,” Clarke replied angrily.

“Look, if it makes you that uncomfortable, you can come to dinner with us,” she told her. “We’ll be at Breadsticks. Bring a date so we can double.” With that, Raven grabbed her stuff and disappeared out of the room, leaving Clarke to stare after her.

Sighing, Clarke walked back over to Bellamy and continued the workout. Bellamy talked about the date nonstop, asking for her advice about topics of conversation and what he should wear. Clarke answered but wasn’t really paying any attention to their conversation.

Things had been going too smoothly lately. She’d been due for something to happen.

* * *

Finding a date last minute was hard. Clarke didn’t know many girls at the school other than Raven and her group of friends, but she didn’t even know them very well. So, she had asked out Emori, one of the girls in her gym class. She didn’t have many friends. She had a deformed hand, and a lot of people steered clear of her. Clarke didn’t understand why. The few times Clarke had spoken with her, the girl was funny and resourceful.

Clarke made sure to make it clear to Emori they were going as friends- purely to look out for Raven. Emori had seemed skeptical but had played along. The last thing Clarke needed was for Emori to get the wrong idea about Clarke.

Waiting in front of the dorms, Clarke paced back and forth. Raven and Bellamy would already be at the restaurant. They were probably laughing and bonding, maybe even kissing. The thought bothered Clarke more than it should have.

Emori emerged from the building, and the two of them walked to Breadsticks, making very little small talk. Clarke wasn’t much in the mood for talking, and Emori didn’t like pointless chatter. Silence worked for them.

Glancing at her phone, Clarke saw Monroe and Monty had texted her ‘good luck’. She’d finally decided to fill in her friends. She needed objective perspectives. They all pretty much told her to do what she felt was right, which was anything but helpful.

“So, remind me again why we’re going to dinner with your roommate and his new girlfriend,” Emori asked, breaking the silence.

Clarke sighed, “I don’t think Raven actually wants to go out with Bellamy. I think she’s using him for something, and I just want to make sure no one gets hurt.”

“Are you sure you just aren’t jealous of Bellamy?” Emori asked. When Clarke gave her a confused look, she continued, “Do you like Raven? Maybe want her to be with you instead of him?”

“What?” Clarke was taken by surprise. “Raven and I are just friends. I’m looking out for her.”

Emori nodded, but she was side eyeing Clarke, knowing she wasn’t being completely honest. “Right.” Thankfully, the restaurant was in sight, and Emori dropped the topic.

Taking a deep breath, Clarke steeled herself before opening the door and holding it open for Emori to walk through. She told the host they were sitting with some friends, and they walked out into the dining area, looking around for familiar faces.

She caught sight of the back of Bellamy’s head and began walking over to them. “Hey, guys,” she said in her most casual voice. Be chill. Laid back.

“Hey!” Raven and Bellamy replied at the same time. Both seemed rather eager, happy, and a bit relieved she was there, which was weird.

Brows furrowed, Clarke introduced Emori to them. Emori just smiled at them. “What did we miss?” Clarke asked, glancing between the two of them.

“Oh,” Raven smiled, scooting closer to Bellamy. She wrapped her hands around his arm. “I was just telling Bellamy how great it is to be with a real man.”

Bellamy frowned, “No you didn’t.”

“Well,” Raven gave him a pointed look. “I was about to.”

The waiter came over with glasses of water for Clarke and Emori, interrupting the conversation momentarily. He slunk away quietly when no one acknowledged him.

Suddenly, Emori leaned in closer to Clarke, putting a hand over hers. Startled, Clarke whipped her head around and tried to pull her hand free. Emori just held it tighter and looked sweetly into Clarke’s eyes. She had a glint in her eye that Clarke recognized. She didn’t mean what she was doing.

Clarke glanced up at the couple across the table, nervous. She found Raven’s mouth on Bellamy’ neck, kissing up to his mouth. Bellamy was enjoying it, kissing her back. It hurt to watch. Clarke tried to clear her throat in the hopes that her friends would come up for air. They didn’t.

Unable to keep watching, Clarke stood up, “I have to go.” Now Bellamy and Raven broke apart, and Clarke cast one more glance at Bellamy before she stormed out of the restaurant, ignoring Raven as she called after her. Emori trailed behind as they walked back to campus.

“I get it now,” Emori told her seriously.

Clarke glanced at her, “What’s to get?”

“It’s not Raven you had a crush on; it’s Bellamy,” Emori answered, looking over at Clarke for confirmation. She said it so matter-of-factly.

There really was no point in lying to Emori. The girl would know she wasn’t being honest. Besides, she felt like she could probably trust her to keep her secret. “I didn’t realize I was that obvious,” Clarke told her, giving her a small smile.

“I was coming onto you in there in the hopes of getting Raven jealous- that’s who I figured you had a crush on. I was trying to help. But when we left, I saw you looking at Bellamy not Raven, and I put it together,” she shrugged nonchalantly.

Clarke nodded, unsure what to say. “It’s not a big deal. I just spend a lot of time with Bellamy. It was bound to happen, right?”

“You make it sound like you only like him because of Stockholm syndrome,” Emori teased. “It’s okay to admit the real reason.”

Laughing, Clarke agreed, “You’re good, you know that?”

“I do,” Emori nodded her head, a grin on her face. “If you ever want to talk to someone about it, you know where to find me.”

“Thanks, Emori,” Clarke said. She found they were in front of Emori’s dorm room.

“Any time,” Emori replied before she disappeared inside the building.

Letting out a deep breath, Clarke made her way back to her own dorm room. Bellamy wasn’t back, yet. Probably too busy making out with Raven.

The Polis game was in a couple days. She could make it that long. Then she’d be gone and forget all about Bellamy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys again so much for all your comments and kudos and subscriptions. I love you all! Can't wait to hear what you have to say after this chapter!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd say there will be 2 or 3 chapters left after this!

Finn Collins was currently looking at the arrivals and departures board in the London International Airport checking to make sure his flight back home was still on time. It was. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out his phone debating with himself on whether he should give Clarke a heads up that he was coming back early or not. He decided leaving it as a surprise would be well worth it.

Instead, he searched his phone for Echo’s name and number. If he was going to be starting at a new school, he wanted to make a clean break with her. Clarke was right; she wasn’t right for him. Funny how time and distance away had helped him realize that. It had been blissful being away from her for a week. He should feel more guilty about feeling that way than he did.

Echo didn’t answer, which was probably better for him. He could talk to her when they get back, and the plane ride back over would give him plenty of time to think through what he wanted to say. He was sent to voicemail, and he decided to let her know things weren’t okay.

“Echo, I don’t know if Clarke told you, but I’ve been in London. I’m coming back a bit early. When I get back, we really need to talk. I’ll call you.”

Ending the call, he wondered if he should have even called her now. He could have waited until he got back to talk to her. Finn would be lying if he didn’t admit he hoped Echo would squirm a little wondering what he wanted to talk about.

His soon to be ex-girlfriend was a lot of things, but stupid wasn’t one of them. She had to know things weren’t great between them; she had to see this coming. Maybe in the week he was gone, she’d gone and find a new boy toy to play with. He could only hope.

Letting out a deep breath, he grabbed his carry-on bag and wheeled it over to his gate and waited to board.

* * *

The dreaded day was here. She’d managed to forget all about it until her mother called her early in the morning to remind her to be at the luncheon by noon. Clarke thought she’d hated the carnival. This would be an all new level of terribleness. The only good news was it got her away from Bellamy for a few hours, so she couldn’t look at him without imagining him and Raven making out, which wasn’t good for her sanity.

Oddly enough, when he came back from his date with Raven, he’d been pretty quiet and hadn’t said much about it. She’d thought it’d be all he’d talk about considering it was like his dream come true. Maybe kissing wasn’t something dudes talked about with each other. She made a mental note to text Monty and Jasper later to get their opinion.

“Stop daydreaming about Bellamy and focus on how you’re going to get through this luncheon today,” Monroe scolded Clarke. Monroe was braiding pieces of Clarke’s hair and making her seem presentable today. Clarke was supposed to have been working on her makeup.

“Don’t ruin her fun. If it was up to Clarke, she’d only be with Bellamy in her daydreams,” Cut in Fox, who was sorting through her wardrobe looking for a suitable dress that Clarke could wear.

“Screw both of you,” Clarke told them, refusing to make eye contact with Monroe in the mirror. The whole Bellamy situation was hard enough without them to make fun of her for it. “Can we drop the Bellamy topic? I just want to focus on getting through this luncheon.”

Fox held up her hands in surrender. “Sorry.”

“Echo and Raven are going to be there,” Monroe reminded her.

Clarke sighed. “I know. I’m hoping Echo will avoid me, and Raven has no real reason to interact with Clarke Griffin, so I should be safe on both accounts.”

The girls nodded in agreement and went back to their assigned duties. “Have you heard from Finn lately? How’s his gig going?” Monroe asked.

Clarke shrugged her shoulders, “I talked to him a few days ago. He was loving London; the audience loved his music.”

“He’s a talented musician, so it would make sense,” Fox replied.

“I can’t wait for him to get back, though, then I can go back to being Clarke Griffin. I feel like I’m having a giant identity crisis,” Clarke admitted.

“Tomorrow’s the big game. You just have to get through two more days,” Fox reminded her.

“Okay, done. Go slip into your outfit,” Monroe told her as she finished styling Clarke’s hair.

Clarke did as she was bid, slipping into a sleek, white peplum dress. It was perfect for this luncheon- made her look mature, older, lady-like. The complete opposite of the life she’d been living up until this moment. “If I discount all the lies and the nervous of being discovered as a fraud, I have to say I’ve enjoyed being Finn more than I’ve enjoyed being Clarke lately.”

Monroe frowned as she got up to stand next to Clarke and examined her in the mirror. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, as Finn, I don’t have anyone telling me I need to act a certain way. As a girl, I always have something to prove. It’s not the same when I’m being Finn. I just enjoy that freedom,” Clarke confessed to her friends, looking guilty.

“Clarke Griffin, you are an amazing badass woman. You don’t need to prove yourself to anyone. Everyone that matters already knows you’re dopest person we know,” Monroe insisted, putting her arm around her friend comfortingly, squeezing her shoulder.

“But for the record,” Fox cut in, coming over on the other side of Clarke to give her a side hug, “It’s going to be fantastic when you beat Shumway tomorrow. I can’t wait to see the look on his face.”

“Tomorrow will definitely be one for the record books,” Clarke agreed.

One day, Clarke would be on time to one of these social events. Today was not that day.

The luncheon was being held at one of the most prestigious convention centers in town. Beautiful flowers and fairy lights decorated the lobby. When she arrived, there wasn’t a soul in sight. Cringing for the lecture that was sure to ensue, she hurried to the party room in the back where she knew the luncheon was taking place. Trying to be quiet, she pushed on the door, and it slid open with a bang, causing every head in the room to whip around and stare at her.

She held up her hand in a half wave and hurried to an open spot at one of the tables. Looking around at the women seated at her table, Clarke didn’t recognize one of them. Thankfully, she wasn’t seated with Echo or Raven. She needed the space.

Listening to the different speakers giving tips on how all the debutantes could be graceful and charming was the most boring think Clarke could imagine doing. The only good part of the afternoon was the food. It really was delicious, and there was nothing Clarke could complain about.

From Clarke’s seat, she had the perfect position to watch Raven at her table. Raven was the epitome of the perfect debutante. While she might have misgivings about some of the things she had to do. She did it with a smile on her face. She didn’t allow the public to see the side of her that wanted to complain. Raven was funny, nice, graceful, and charming.

Raven’s table erupted in laughter, and Clarke’s stomach just kept dropping as she watched Raven charm the entire room. Bellamy was a lucky man. Raven really was an amazing woman. It was hard to be upset with Raven, though she really wanted to. She had to remind herself it wasn’t Raven’s fault that Bellamy was so head over heels for her.

That didn’t mean Clarke wasn’t fuming inside.

When Raven got up and headed towards the bathroom, Clarke got up and followed her. She wasn’t real sure why, nor did she know what she hoped to accomplish. She just wanted to get a closer look at the girl. As a girl and not as Finn.

In the bathroom, Raven was freshening up, running her hands through her hair and then reapplied her lipstick. Trying discreetly to watch Raven out of the corner of her eye, Clarke pretended to be freshening up as well. Her hair still looked good pulled back in the many braids Monroe had given her. Her makeup, surprisingly, wasn’t running everywhere. She still looked pretty put together.

Raven caught Clarke staring. She did a double taking before saying, “Oh, you’re the girl from the carnival? From the kissing booth!”

Trying to act just as pleasantly surprised, Clarke nodded inconspicuously, “I wondered why you looked so familiar!”

“Small world! I’m Raven,” she extended her hand, and Clarke shook it firmly.

“I’m Clarke,” she almost said she was Finn’s cousin, but she didn’t want Raven to know her association to him just yet. “So, I’ve heard through the grapevine that you’re dating Bellamy Blake.”

“Oh,” Raven nodded awkwardly. “Ya. Why, do you know him?”

“I met him briefly at the kissing booth. Have you kissed him, yet?” She tried to ask in her most casual voice. If she pretended he didn’t care enough, it’d be true, right?

“Oh, no, not yet,” Raven shook her head as she played with her hair, looking at her reflection in the mirror.

Clarke tried her best to hide her surprise and then her happiness at Raven’s admission. Schooling her features into neutral, she replied, “From one girl to the next, I’d just try to prolong the kissing as long as possible.”

“What?” Raven asked. “Why?”

“He must have a problem or doesn’t know how to kiss or something. I felt like I was drowning. So much spit.” Clarke made a gagging noise. This might be super petty, but she wasn’t breaking them up or anything, just delaying the inevitable.

“Oh god,” Raven grimaced. “Thanks for the warning.”

“Other than that, I hope you guys are happy together,” Clarke told her, forcing a pleasant smile onto her face.

Raven hesitated, giving her reflection a hard look, then she turned to Clarke and confessed, “Actually, if I’m honest, I’m only going out with Bellamy to make his roommate Finn jealous.” When Raven saw Clarke’s confused look, she hurriedly continued, “I know that’s so wrong, but I really really like Finn. He’s cute, but not in that obvious way, you know? He’s funny and so understanding. I feel like I have this connection with him that I’ve never had with anyone else.”

The more Raven spoke, the more horrified Clarke felt. The signs were all there. The long looks, the smiles, the giggling, the offense she had taken when Clarke had said she wasn’t her type. Looking back, everything was painfully obvious. Hindsight was twenty twenty.

Stifling a groan, Clarke tried to think of a way to salvage the situation. She could let Raven down easy if only she could get Raven to confess her feelings. She’d also need to make sure Raven let down Bellamy easy. It’d crush him to find out that Raven was only using him. Especially to get to her.

If this were any other situation, Clarke would have gladly gone out with Raven. She seemed like such an amazing person- everything Clarke normally looked for in a partner. As it was, their situation was less than ideal, and Clarke couldn’t knowingly go into a relationship with her on a lie. Especially when she’d be leaving the school in a couple days.

“Oh boy,” Clarke blew a stray strand of hair out of her face, staring at her reflection in the mirror, as if waiting for the reflection to give her some sort of an idea of what to do or say.

“I know. It’s kind of all gotten a little crazy,” Raven admitted with a cringe. At least she knew what she was doing was wrong. That was the first step.

Squaring her shoulders, Clarke turned and faced Raven. “Girl, you’re spinning a tangled web of lies and deceit. Not a good way to make an impression on anyone,” Clarke told her honestly.

Raven nodded, “I know. Very tangled.”

“If you keep going, someone’s going to get hurt, and I can’t imagine you’d want that,” Clarke said hopefully.

Raven shook her head this time, “Of course not. I don’t want anyone to get hurt. This was all supposed to be harmless.”

“You have to come clean,” Clarke told her firmly. “You need to fix this. You’ll feel better, and both Bellamy and his roommate will appreciate the honesty.”

“You’re right,” Raven agreed. “I just need to put it out on the table, see how the dice fall.”

“Exactly.”

“When I get back to school, I’m going to go find Finn and tell him how I feel. And then I’m going to kiss him so passionately that even his enemies will feel pleasure,” Raven told her matter-of-factly.

Clarke had been nodding her head in encouragement and agreement until the kissing part. She tried to interrupt, but Raven wasn’t listening, lost in her own fantasies.

Suddenly, a toilet flushed, and the stall door flung open. Walking angrily out of the stall, Echo went right up to Raven. “How dare you,” Echo spat between clenched teeth. “Finn is my boyfriend, and you need to stay away from him.”

“Uh, ex-boyfriend,” Clarke cut in unhelpfully, causing Echo to give her a sharp look.

Raven smiled and replied, “Oh, you’re the girl in the restaurant that Finn dumped last week.”

Echo stood up straight, taking a deep breath, “We’re just going through a rough patch right now.”

“Rough patch? From what I heard, he washed his hands of you, and if Finn wants to go out with me, that’s his choice. You don’t have much of a say,” Raven told Echo. She seemed pretty smug with herself, and it was nice to see Raven so confident with herself.

“Excuse me,” Echo shook her head, “You can’t just barge into a couple’s relationship. We’re going to work this out.”

“You’re so lost in denial you can’t see that Finn wants nothing to do with you,” Raven said. “Not only are you in denial, you’re also delusional.”

Clarke was surprised to see both of these girls stooping to this level. Obviously, Echo must have felt something real for Finn, or why else would she putting up such a fight? Clearly, Echo had some misconceptions that needed to be cleared up. Raven liked Finn so much that she was willing to get petty and catty to get a chance with him. She seemed so confident that Finn would choose her over Echo. She was probably right, but she wasn’t going to get what she wanted either.

It was hard to watch the two of them fighting like this. Because of her. Clarke was the one that had taken the initiative and broken up with Echo. Finn might kill her when he finds out what she had done. Raven had a crush on a lie, and unfortunately, short of coming clean, there wasn’t much that Clarke could do about it. And she couldn’t come clean. Not yet.

As much as she might want to, she couldn’t risk coming out just yet. If it got to the wrong people, she’d be kicked out and wouldn’t be able to play in the game tomorrow. She’d come too far to throw it all away now. That didn’t mean her decision was easy. She was hurting people with her lies and watching them suffer wasn’t what she wanted.

When Echo shoved Raven, it snapped Clarke out of her thoughts. It must have taken Raven by surprise as well if the look on her face was anything to go by. Clarke watched as surprise was replaced by determination and anger. Pushing away from the sink she had fallen into, she shoved Echo into the bathroom stalls. Catching herself, Echo turned and slapped Raven across the face.

“Stop!” Clarke rushed forward and caught Echo’s arm, so she couldn’t slap her again.

Shrugging Clarke off of her, Echo turned back to Raven, who had pulled her arm back and punched Echo in the mouth. Hissing in pain, Raven shook out her hand.

When Echo’s hand came away from her lip with blood on it, she charged Raven, tackling her to the ground. Straddling her, she started pulling Raven’s hair and slapping her.

Before Clarke could rush forward, Raven had maneuvered herself into a position that could throw Echo off of her. Hurrying, Clarke jumped onto Echo’s back, hoping this would either crumple her or slow her down. It barely slowed her as she continued to advance on Raven.

Hopping off of Echo’s back, Clarke kept a hold of her shoulders, pulling down so that Echo fell onto her back. Raven tried to hurry to the door while Echo was down, but Echo twisted and grabbed Raven’s ankles, pulling her to the bathroom floor with her.

As Clarke was trying to pry off Echo’s hands from Raven’s ankle, the bathroom door flew open. The chairwoman stood before them with disappointment and judgement in her eyes.

“When ladies disagree,” the woman told them, “they say it with their eyes.”

The three debutantes quickly got to their feet, straightening their clothes and trying to tame their hair.

The chairwoman saw Clarke and shook her head, “Miss Griffin, why is it every time there’s a scuffle, you’re somehow involved?”

“Bad timing?” Clarke suggested sheepishly. This was going to get back to her mother, and she was in for the lecture of her life. It seemed all these events ended with Clarke ruining something.

“We’re going to go back out there and finish this luncheon without further incident, aren’t we?” the way the chairwoman said it, it wasn’t really a question. It was a statement of fact, leaving very little room for doubt that she’d do something unpleasant if this were to happen again.

The three girls nodded their heads and filed out of the bathroom in front of the chairwoman. Finding their seats, they ate the rest of their lunch in silence. The rest of the women in the room were giving them all awkward glances, but Clarke ignored them throughout the rest of the afternoon.

* * *

Finn couldn’t believe his luck. His flights had all been on time, and he arrived at Arkadia Academy before suppertime. He got out of the cab and grabbed his guitar case out of the backseat while the driver grabbed his bag out of the trunk. After he tipped the driver, he glanced around and tried to decide where he should go.

Before he could really do anything, a beautiful brunette girl was running up to him. She planted her lips on his, giving him a hard, quick kiss with a promise of what was to come. She whispered his song lyrics in his ear and said she’d see him at the game tomorrow before she took off running down the sidewalk away from him.

Flabbergasted, Finn wasn’t sure what to think of the exchange. Were all the women this friendly at this school? He wasn’t about to complain. Of course, he wouldn’t do anything until after he had the opportunity to talk to Echo and officially end things with her. He checked his phone and saw she still hadn’t called or texted him.

Feeling pretty good about himself, Finn grabbed his guitar case and his bag and headed to the restaurant he saw just off of campus. He was starving and wanted to see the campus a bit before he headed up to his dorm room. He would have went to the cafeteria on campus, but he didn’t want to deal with the other students yet.

“I think I’m going to like it here,” he mumbled to himself, a smile on his face.

* * *

It was always hard leaving her friends to come back to Arkadia Academy. She’d enjoyed spending time with Monroe and Fox and recounting everything that had gone wrong at the luncheon. The girls made her laugh and feel better before they dropped her off at the school.

“We’ll be reunited in a couple days, girl!” Monroe told her, and she got out of the car to come around and give Clarke a hug goodbye.

Fox got out of the backseat and waited for her turn for a hug, “You’re going to kick ass at the soccer game tomorrow.”

“We’ll be there front and center tomorrow,” Monroe assured Clarke with a reassuring smile.

“Thanks. I have no idea how I would have done this without you both. You’re the best,” she told them both. Then she asked, “Will Monty and Jasper be there?”

“Are you kidding?” Monroe laughed. “Jasper is going to show up with a camera and catch every moment of you kicking Polis’ butt. They’re hoping you’ll come out as a girl at the end of the match and shove it down Shumway’s throat.”

Clarke and Fox joined in the laughter. “That would be pretty dramatic,” Fox agreed. “Please do it.”

“I don’t know that I’d be brave enough to do it,” Clarke admitted. Dropping the facade in front of all those people didn’t sound like fun. She had to be careful because she didn’t want to ruin anything for Finn when he did finally show up in a couple days.

“Okay, we better go,” Fox said giving Clarke one final hug. “We’ll see you tomorrow, Clarke.”

“Oh wait, your wig looks crooked,” Monroe said as she shifted it across her head until it was sitting just right. She made sure no stray strands of her real hair were peeking out. Satisfied, she smiled and gave Clarke a hug goodbye.

Clarke stood on the curb waving goodbye to her friends until they disappeared down the street. Taking a deep breath, she turned back to the school. It would be her last night on campus. Her last night being Finn, her last night seeing Bellamy, and her last night being a boy. 

* * *

Fuming from anger and embarrassment, Echo paced her room. She’d call Finn again and make him explain himself. Reaching for her phone, which she had left in her room all day, she saw she had a missed call from Finn and a voicemail.

Her heart fluttered in relief. He had probably called to apologize and beg for forgiveness. She’d probably give it to him, too. Once he groveled enough.

She went to her voicemails and played the message. “Echo, I don’t know if Clarke told you, but I’ve been in London. I’m coming back a bit early. When I get back, we really need to talk. I’ll call you.”

Staring in disbelief at her phone, she tried to piece together what she had just heard. Finn had been in London? But she’d just seen him the other day at the Carnival. There was no way he could have gone to London and back in just a couple days. Why would he lie about that, though, if he wanted to talk to her? She’d been trying to talk to him for a week.

She wasn’t sure why, but she felt this was all Clarke Griffin’s fault. She was always there rubbing her nose in things that weren’t any of her business.

Reaching for her phone, she dialed Finn’s number.

Surprisingly, he answered for a change.

“Finn. I just got your voicemail. You’ve been in London? For how long?” She decided to cut right to the point. She wasn’t even interested in what his voicemail was about.

“Hi to you, too. Yes, I’ve been in London at a music festival. I was there for like a week and a half. Didn’t Clarke tell you? Clarke had covered for me with school and everything. I just figured Clarke would have told you,” Finn answered, he sounded genuine.

“No, she must have forgotten to mention anything to me,” Echo replied, disdain dripping from every word.

Echo had known Clarke Griffin and Finn Collins for years, though she had only been dating Finn for about a year. The two cousins did look a bit alike. If Clarke had been pretending to be Finn this entire time, it would make sense why she/he had been avoiding her like the plague for the last week.

She wasn’t sure what she was going to do, yet. But it was not going to be pleasant for Clarke Griffin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't wait to hear what you guys have to say about this chapter!   
> Thank you guys all for reading and for all of your amazing comments and kudos! I love you all!


	9. Chapter 9

When Clarke returned to their dormroom that night, she was looking forward to just going to bed almost immediately. With the game tomorrow, she wanted to get a good night’s rest. Tomorrow meant everything, and she didn’t want to do anything to jeopardize her being at the top of her game. 

She was feeling pretty good with herself as she threw her bag on bed. She was first string, so she knew she was going to be able to see the field tomorrow. With all the practice she and Bellamy had been doing, she knew she was ready. Shoving a victory down Shumway’s throat would be all too sweet. 

“How’s it going, my homie,” Clarke said as she took shucked off her shoes, tossing them in the closet. She grabbed her toiletries and her pajamas, ready to head into the bathroom to change. When Bellamy didn’t reply, she turned to him. He was sitting at his desk working on his homework. Had he not heard her? 

Inching closer to Bellamy, Clarke was going to try and startle him a little. He was staring intently at the pages of his textbook. But as she got closer, he swiveled in his chair to face her, “Does stabbing me in the back normally make you this cheery?” he asked her.

Clarke recoiled at his words. He thought she stabbed in the back? How? She’d been gone all day. What could have changed? Unless he found out she had been lying to him this entire time. Her heart dropped at the thought. She had hoped to tell him in her own way after the game tomorrow, to explain everything. This wasn’t how she wanted to have this conversation.

“What do you mean?” she asked, needing to be sure what he was talking about.

“I thought we were friends,” he was refusing to look at her again, staring at the floor now. He seemed deflated, sad.

“We are friends!” Clarke rushed to assure him. This, at least, wasn’t a lie. 

“You have a funny way of showing it,” Bellamy replied, but he made no move to elaborate. 

Waiting a few seconds, Clarke hoped Bellamy would say something. When he didn’t, she asked, “I have no idea what you’re talking about, Bellamy.” 

“Stop lying!” Bellamy told her angrily. When he made eye contact with her, his eyes were bloodshot, the vein in his neck pulsing. “I saw you kissing Raven.” He stood up, like he wanted to start pacing, but the room was too small, and he ended up standing there awkwardly still.

Of all the things she’d expected Bellamy to say, that wasn’t even in the realm of possibilities. Shaking her head in confusion, she stumbled for words, “What are you talking about? I have never kissed Raven.” 

“I saw you two kissing, so you can stop lying to me,” Bellamy shook his head.

“What?” Clarke was still flabbergasted that this was a conversation they were having. “I would never do that to you!” Where was this coming from? She hadn’t been on campus all day, and they had been fine as of this morning. This turn of events made no sense.

“Well you did, and I can’t even bare to look at you,” he said, turning his back on her as he reached for his textbook. 

“Bellamy, I did speak with Raven today, but I promise you I didn’t kiss her,” Clarke couldn’t tell him where she had spoken with Raven, but she could at least try to stick as close to the truth as possible. “She told me that she was only using you to get to me. I’m sorry. I told her not to use you like that. I stuck up for you!” 

“You think I’m that dumb I didn’t know that?” Bellamy asked. He sounded less angry and more hurt now. When Clarke was at a loss for words, he continued, “I didn’t know right away, but after our double date last night, it was pretty obvious she had no interest in me. I just thought you would have given me time to adjust before you made your move. Talking to me about it would have been preferable.”

“Bellamy, I promise you that I don’t like Raven like that. I never would have done anything with her because I knew how you felt. You have to believe me,” Clarke tried again. There really wasn’t a whole lot she could do to prove herself one way or the other. 

“I’d like to believe you, but I know what I saw.”

“Raven may not have worked out for you, but my cousin Clarke is crazy about you. If you’d just give her a chance-” 

Bellamy walked over to Clarke and started pushing her to the door, “You just want me to date your cousin so you can be with Raven and not feel guilty. Well, I’m not going to make it that easy for you.” He opened the door and slammed the door in her face.

Clarke wanted to barge back into the room and tell him he was crazy. She had no idea what he’d actually seen, but it was clear he believed it. It hurt to know he thought so little of her. He should have at least given her the benefit of the doubt. She wondered how he could have seen something that never happened. 

Briefly, she thought about finding Raven and talking to her about it, but she didn’t want Bellamy to find out and get the wrong idea. As she stared at the closed door, she realized she had bigger issues. She needed a place to stay. She dug into her pocket to call Monroe or Monty, but it wasn’t in her pocket. Belatedly, she realized she left her phone in the room.

She wasn’t brave enough to risk going back into the room. Sighing heavily, she turned from the door and headed down the hallway and out the room. It wasn’t too bad out, so she could probably fall asleep on one of the benches or under a tree. It wouldn’t be too bad. 

After she found a bench, she took a seat and ran her argument with Bellamy over in her head. The more she thought about it, the more angry it made Clarke. He had been so sure she’d betrayed him. They’d only been friends for a week and a half, but she would have thought he’d know her better by now. 

How had things gotten so twisted? This made leaving tomorrow night simultaneously easier and harder all at the same time.

It would be easier to leave with him mad at her. There’d be no messy goodbyes, and she wouldn’t come clean to him about who she really was. She was sure he’d notice something different when the real Finn showed up, but maybe if he continued to avoid Finn like he clearly wanted to do with her, it wouldn’t be a huge deal.

It would be harder to leave now because Clarke still really liked Bellamy. She’d regret not trying to clear the air between them. If she didn’t say goodbye to him, she’d get no closure. Even if she tried to talk to him, he clearly didn’t care enough to listen. He had his opinion of her, and it didn’t look like anything she said or did would change his mind.

Slumping down so that the back of her head his the back of the bench, she stared up at the sky. She could see the moon and only the brightest of the stars. The lights were too bright, blocking out the smaller, twinkling stars she knew were there.

“Penny for your thoughts,” came a familiar voice. 

Clarke sat up and gave Emori a weak smile. “You don’t even want to know.”

“I wouldn’t have asked if that were true,” Emori answered as she sat beside Clarke, waiting patiently.

Sighing, Clarke replied, “I just got kicked out of my dorm room, and I have nowhere to go.”

Frowning, Emori offered, “You can crash in my dorm room. My roommate is staying off campus with her parents for the next couple days, so it’s no trouble.”

“I don’t want to impose,” Clarke shook her head.

Emori stood up and motioned for Clarke to follow her, “You’re not. Now, come on.” 

They walked in silence to Emori’s dorm room. Thankfully no one was at the front desk when they got to the dorm, so they didn’t have to worry about sneaking Clarke passed them. Once they made it to Emori’s room, Clarke plopped down on the rug in the middle of the room and sprawled out. Emori locked the door before throwing herself onto the bed.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Emori asked Clarke after a moment, her tone careful.

“No, but thanks. I just want to go to sleep and play soccer tomorrow,” Clarke told her honestly. 

Nodding her head in understanding, Emori threw Clarke a blanket and a pillow wordlessly. She left to go change and brush her teeth. Closing her eyes, she tried to take deep breaths. Her phone was in her room, so she couldn’t text her friends. She desperately wanted to talk to them- needed them to calm her down and assure her all of this was worth it.

Rolling onto her side, she tried to get comfortable and fall asleep. The sooner tomorrow got here, the sooner she could leave and put all of this behind her. Emori came back and quietly slipped into bed. Clarke was glad she’d made a friend in Emori. She didn’t push and prod for answers. It was nice.

It took a long time, but she finally fell asleep.

When she awoke, she could hear Emori on her laptop working on something. The scent of coffee had her sitting up and looking around for some of her own. Emori pointed at her desk where there was a thermos. Grabbing it, the coffee was still blessedly warm. Taking a sip, Clarke relished the warmth. 

“Thanks for the coffee,” Clarke said. “What time is it?” She really hated not having her phone. 

Glancing at the corner of her computer, Emori replied, “10:50.”

Clarke started, nearly dropping the thermos of hot liquid. “What? The game starts in ten minutes. Why didn’t you wake me?” Setting the thermos down, she hurriedly grabbed her shoes and started pulling them on.

“I’m not your mom. You didn’t say what time the game was, and I didn’t know,” Emori shrugged nonchalantly. 

“Thanks for letting me crash here. I’ll talk to you later!” With that, Clarke hurried out the dorm, heading across campus to the soccer field.Thankfully her uniform was in her locker, so she wouldn’t have to go back to her dorm.

This wasn’t a good way to start the morning. This day meant everything, and she was running late. She wondered if Bellamy was hoping she wouldn’t show up. Would their rift affect the game today? She couldn't allow that to happen. If she had to win this game single handed, she would do it. She had too much to lose.

 

* * *

Finn was roused from sleep, dreaming about the beautiful brunette who had surprised him the night before, with a bunch of guys running into the room, hollering and shouting. At first, he thought they were just trying to get his roommate awake, but upon sitting up, he saw his roommate wasn’t in the room. 

“Collins, get up! The soccer game’s about to start! Let’s go!” one of the guys yelled at him before they disappeared out of the room in as much of a frenzy as when they entered.

“Soccer game?” he asked groggily as he sat up and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. 

Apparently team spirit was a big thing at this school, which would take Finn some time to get used to. He wasn’t sure how he felt being forced to watch the game, but he wanted to get to know his classmates and make some friends. He quickly changed and got ready, and followed the gaggle of people streaming towards the soccer field.

He hadn’t had a chance to actually introduce himself to his new roommate, but he also wanted to thank him for getting all of his stuff unpacked and put away. He’d really gone above and beyond the duties of a roommate. He would have said something as they walked to the pitch, but his roommate seemed to be ignoring him, choosing to walk with his friends and leaving Finn to himself. 

There had always been the possibility that he wouldn’t get along with his roommate, but he presumed that’d happen after they got to know each other and found they had opposite personalities. He hadn’t thought his roommate would be this cold. He probably had enjoyed the room to himself and wasn’t liking the idea of having to share. He’d have to get over it.

Finn was about to go towards the  bleachers and find a good seat. Maybe he’d be in luck and the pretty girl from the night before would be at the game, too, and he could sit with her. Before he could take more than two steps towards the bleachers, he was being pulled into the adjacent locker rooms and told to suit up. 

He didn’t play soccer, and he couldn’t fathom why they thought he did. Had he accidentally signed up for it when he signed up for classes? He found the locker with his name above it, and it had a uniform ready and waiting for him. 

Grabbing it, he wasn’t sure what to think as he started changing into the uniform as all the other players around him were doing the same. Most were talking over him about the game and how they were going to wipe the floor with Polis. He wanted to share in the sentiment, but he was too dumbfounded by his situation to say much of anything.

Finn was about to bolt, to apologize and then escape, but presumably the coach walked into the room, and everyone quieted down to hear what he had to say. Finn missed what he said- he was too busy trying to think of a good way to get himself out of this situation.

He’d only just arrived at Arkadia less than 24 hours ago, and he had been kissed by a beautiful girl and thrust onto a team he knew nothing about. Soccer was Clarke’s thing, not Finn’s. He’d practiced with her before, but he wasn’t good. If they actually made him play, it would not be pretty.

A thought came to him in his panic. Maybe this wasn’t a huge deal, but a fun, little scrimmage. It was the only explanation Finn could come up with to explain his current predicament.

Dumbfounded, nervous, and a little anxious, Finn Collins followed his teammates out of the locker room and emerged onto the field with his teammates to the thunderous applause and shouting of the fans in the stands. As Finn looked around, he didn’t think there was an empty seat.

Taking a deep breath, Finn reminded himself he just needed to stay confident and look forward to having fun. The brunette said she’d see him at the game today. Well, what better way to make sure she saw him then to be on the field front and center?

 

* * *

Clarke wanted to cry when she got to the locker room and found her uniform missing. Had Bellamy taken it in his anger to get back at her? She couldn’t see him being that mean, but she honestly had no other explanations. Searching the other lockers for a spare uniform, Clarke didn’t know what to do when she came up empty. This could not be happening. 

Glancing around the locker room, her gaze honed in on the clock. The game was already starting. There was no profanity Clarke could think of to express exactly what she was feeling. Sneaking out onto field, she stayed well behind the bench where Coach Kane was yelling at the team about something or other. Maybe she could get one of the people on the bench to give her their uniform.

Not wanting to get caught by Coach Kane, she snuck over to a barricade to take in the game and weigh her options. 

“Collins! What are you doing?” Coach Kane yelled out, and Clarke didn’t think she’d ever heard him that angry. 

She nervously glanced over at him, prepared to apologize and beg and grovel, anything to get to play today. However, Coach Kane wasn’t looking in her direction at all, he was yelling at someone on the field. Following his line of sight, Clarke saw her cousin Finn getting the ball stolen from him. 

Shit. What was he doing here already? If he was getting back early, he should have called her! Finn was ruining her big day. How could this be happening? Everything that could go wrong in the last 24 hours has gone wrong. Clarke wasn’t sure how it could get much worse.

Of course, whenever someone even thinks such a thing, the universe has to prove them wrong. Clarke watched in horror as Headmaster Jaha headed onto the field, stopping the game, Echo right on his heels, a smirk plastered on her lips. They talked to the referees for a bit before returning to the side of the field to talk to Kane.

The referee called a time out, and the players all gathered around the Arkadia bench. Jaha spoke clearly and loudly to make sure he was heard over the crowd in the stands, allowing Clarke to hear everything being said.

Looking at Finn, Jaha asked, “Are you going to come clean? Or are you going to make me do it for you?” Everyone looked at Finn expectantly with confused looks on their faces.

Confusion rippled across Finn’s features as he shook his head, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He’d gone pale, and Clarke wondered if he thought he was getting caught for being gone the last couple weeks. 

Jaha shook his head disappointingly at Finn before turning his attention to Kane, “He’s actually a girl.” 

Echo jumped in stating, “She’s actually Finn’s cousin.” Then she look Finn in the eyes and said, “You have a problem and need serious therapy.”

Clarke couldn’t argue with Echo. She probably did need some therapy after this, but it was too bad really that she’d looked into Finn’s eyes and hadn’t recognized him. Poor Finn was frantically trying to assure his teammates that he was actually a guy and not really a girl. His first day here and he was already involved in a scandal. 

“There’s no point in denying it any longer,” Jaha assured him, reaching for his arm. “We can discuss this in my office.”

Shaking his arm free, Finn stepped away from Jaha. “There’s nothing to discuss. I’m a guy, I can promise you that.”

“Prove it,” Murphy shouted at him. 

For the first time, Clarke glanced at Bellamy, Miller, and Murphy. Miller and Murphy looked bored. Bellamy had an unreadable look on his face. She couldn’t tell him if was bored, tired, surprised, or confused. He was watching the incident intently, and Clarke wished she could talk to him. 

Unsure of what to do, Finn looked around. Finally, he pulled his shorts down in a quick flash to show off the irrefutable proof that he was in fact biologically male. It was enough to prove to everyone standing in the vicinity that he was telling the truth, but no one in the stands could see anything blessedly. 

Coach Kane had clearly had enough and stepped forward. “Are we done here?” 

Jaha exchanged a dark look with Echo and marched her off the field. “We apologize for the interruption, Kane.” Jaha nodded at the referee standing at standby, and the game started up again. 

“Collins, bench. Now,” Kane pointed behind him, and Finn resolutely followed orders. 

The half ended, and the players filed into their respective locker rooms. Finn was lagging behind, pouting. Normally, Clarke would want roll her eyes at him, but now, it worked in her favor. Waiting for most of the team to disappear down the tunnel, she grabbed Finn and pulled him back behind the barricade with her.

“Clarke?” he asked in disbelief.

“Ya, it’s me. I don’t have time to explain. We need to switch outfits,” Clarke told him anxiously, pulling at the sleeves of his shirt with impatience.

“What’s going on?” he shook her off, demanding some sort of explanation.

Sighing heavily, Clarke answered, “I needed to get on the soccer team and prove I can play just as good as the guys. You were gone for a couple weeks, and I saw the opportunity. What are you doing back so soon?” Clarke demanded.

“First of all, this isn’t normal. You know that, right? Second, didn’t you get my message? The festival was done, and I wanted to get back to school,” Finn told her. “I had the best greeting. Last night, this beautiful woman kissed me.”

“Last night? Was it Raven?” she asked, things starting to click. So Finn was the one that Bellamy had seen kissing Raven.

“She didn’t give me her name. She told me she’d be here, though I haven’t had a chance to look for her, yet.”

“We’ll sort this out after the game. Change,” Clarke ordered, and they exchanged outfits. “Stay out of sight.”

The teams were starting to come back onto the field, and Clarke hurried out of hiding to join. This game wasn’t over yet; there was plenty of game for her to come back and win this thing. She had to. 

Losing was not an option.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoo! There should be one- possibly two- chapters left.   
> I hope you all are still enjoying reading these chapters as I am writing them!   
> Your comments, kudos, and subscriptions mean the world to me! Can't wait to see what you guys think is going to happen next! :)


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing about soccer is so much harder when you've never actually played soccer. Enjoy!

“Are you confused?” Jasper leaned over Monty to talk to Monroe and Fox. “Because I’m confused.” He was decked out in Arkadia’s colors, a banner hanging limp in his hand.

Monty shook his head, his brows furrowed. “That couldn’t have been Clarke.” He had matched Jasper’s outfit and had added a bandana to his head to complete the ensemble.

Monroe and Fox agreed, nodding their heads. Monroe had pulled her hair back in two separate space buns on the top of her head and had added Arkadia’s colors to her hair. Fox’s hair had been pulled into two low pigtails and were braided down her chest. They had pilfered some old jerseys from the local thrift store and had taken off the letters on the back to add Griffin.

As they watched the players file off the field to head into their respective locker rooms for half time, they sat in silence as the crowd chattered and hollered around them; they were the only four in their section to still be sitting. Finally, Monroe asked, “Did Finn come back early?”

“If he did, where’s Clarke? And why didn’t she tell us?” Monty asked, glancing between the three of them in bewilderment. Nothing about the first half had made any sense to them.

“Maybe he came back this morning, and Clarke hasn’t had a chance to get ahold of us to let us know?” Fox suggested with a shrug.

“Or maybe that really is Clarke, and she’s got a case of the jitters,” Jasper countered. It didn’t seem likely, but it was the only logical explanation he could come up with.

Monroe shook her head, “No way. Clarke feeds on competitiveness. She would play better, not worse.” Monroe had been Clarke’s teammate longer than they had been friends. No one knew Clarke’s soccer game better than her.

“What was that business on the field when they stopped the game? I thought they were busting Clarke until they left her out there,” Monty asked, reminding them of the odd turn of events three fourths of the way through the first half.

“With Echo there, I thought the same thing,” Fox agreed.

Unfortunately, they had been too high up in the bleachers to hear anything, but they could tell Coach Kane had not been happy about the game being interrupted. The group recognized Echo had been there, and she had brought some school staff with her. Whatever it had been couldn’t have been good. In the end, they had all parted, and Kane had benched Clarke, though that hadn’t helped the game much as the half ended with neither team having scored.

“Did Bellamy and Clarke have a fight?” Monty asked them, changing gears for a moment. “Doesn’t seem like the two of them are in sync at all today.”

“With Clarke playing as badly as she has been, do you blame him?” Jasper commented- not to be mean, but because it was true.

“That’s why I don’t think that’s Clarke,” Monroe told them.

“I’m with Monroe. There’s no way that’s Clarke. I haven’t been able to get ahold of her since yesterday either. I feel like something happened,” Fox admitted.

“Let’s see how the second half plays out. If it’s the same old stuff, we might need to get down there and do some investigating,” Monroe said, which the others agreed to.

Now it was a waiting game for the start of the second half. The watched halfheartedly as the cheerleaders performed a routine on the field, the music blaring over the speakers. It was the longest couple of minutes in their lives.

The crowd suddenly roared, and they found the teams were running back onto the field. Finally standing up to see better, they hoped things would start getting better, not worse. The second half was starting. Finally.

This would be the moment of truth. The four friends held their breath in anticipation.

* * *

There really weren’t any words in the English language Clarke Griffin could use that would be able to explain her feelings as she stepped out onto the pitch to the cheers and applause of the packed crowd around them. There weren’t many open seats. No matter which way she looked, there were faces staring down at her, waiting for something to happen, waiting for her to kick some ass.

She tried to pick out her friends, but there were too many people, too many faces to sort through. Knowing they were there was all she needed. She knew Finn was behind her, staying out of sight to give her plenty of time and freedom to do her thing. With the knowledge that her friends were supporting her, she waited patiently, the competitive calm taking over her body.

Clarke had so much to prove this half. Not only did she need to re-convince her coach that she belonged out there, she had to regain the trust of her teammates. For an entire half of the game, Finn had ruined everything she’d built the past two weeks. It wasn’t his fault per say, but she wasn’t entirely happy about this turn of events. Nothing about the last twenty-four hours was going the way she had thought it would.

If only they could beat Polis. Then she could put this whole fiasco behind her.

The whistle blew, and the game resumed. She’d expected some resistance from her teammates, but it had seemed they were ready for her to redeem herself. They kicked her the ball, and she fled down the field, zig zagging around opponents. This was what she was meant to do, what she had been born for. Pushing her way through a couple opponents, she felt like she was flying down the field.

Passing to Bellamy, she hoped they could get back to being the dynamic duo they usually were in practice. She knew things were weird between them, but Clarke hoped Bellamy had the night to cool down. By the way he refused to pass the ball back to her, it didn’t seem that was the case.

Bellamy’s head was not in the game; he had the ball stolen from him twice. On the second steal, Polis was able to push the ball up the field and score. 1-0. Polis was winning. It didn’t help that Roan was getting up in Bellamy’s face, taunting him.

Clarke knew better than to get in the middle of the fight and let Miller hurry over and pull Bellamy back down the field. She couldn’t hear what they were saying, but she hoped it was a good pep talk to get Bellamy back into the game.

The next time Arkadia had the ball, Murphy passed to Bellamy, who took the ball up the field and refused to pass to anyone. He was a man on a mission. He brought it up the middle, feigned to the right and then brought the ball up and kicked into the corner of the goal, just above Roan’s finger tips.

1-1. Tied.

Glancing at the clock, Clarke knew there wasn’t a whole lot of time left, but there was plenty of time for them to win this. She just needed Bellamy to get his head out his ass and play smart soccer. As they ran back to get into a defensive position, she congratulated Bellamy before she said, “I know you’re mad at me right now, but we can sort that out later. We need to beat these guys.”

Instead of answering, Bellamy opted to ignore her. The ball was coming, forcing Clarke to get back into position. Bellamy stole the ball, and Clarke flew ahead. Polis wasn’t stupid. They weren’t about to let Bellamy go up the middle like he had done previously. So, they flanked him, and someone cut him off, leaving Clarke wide open.

“Open!” she called out loudly, waving her arms. Once. Then twice.

It was like Bellamy had tunnel vision, which caused Polis to steal the ball back. Thankfully, they took a shot too far back, and Arkadia’s goalie was able to easy block the shot. As they hustled back into place, Clarke hurried up to Bellamy, shoving him. She knew she shouldn’t, but she was so angry at how stupid Bellamy was playing to keep her hands to herself.

“Bellamy, I know you’re angry, but we have to put that aside. We have to beat these guys. I have to beat these guys,” she told him, her voice stern but anxious, her eyes pleading with him to understand.

Bellamy only tried to shove off of her, away from her, as though he needed to be anywhere but next to her.

“You listen to me, Bellamy Blake. I will not let you cost me this game,” Clarke told him.

“What’s your problem?” he asked, shoving her back. “Lay off.”

Clarke was about to retort when Roan was running up beside them; Clarke hadn’t even realized they were that close to the goalie’s box already. “You boys almost done with your little cat fight? Some of us want to play some soccer,” he smirked knowingly at Bellamy.

“Back off,” Bellamy warned him, shoving him back. “Get back to your box.”

“You can keep trying, but you’re not getting another ball passed me,” Roan assured Bellamy, as he shoved Bellamy back.

“Unless you start crying again,” Bellamy taunted, his own smirk finding its way to his lips.

“You don’t know what the hell you’re talking about,” Roan walked right back up to Bellamy and invaded his personal space, ready to punch him.

“Both of you stop it,” Clarke hurried over right as Roan was extending his arms to shove Bellamy to the ground. Clarke always did have a knack for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. She’d got in the way, and Roan shoved her so hard, she fell to the ground. Blessedly, it didn’t really hurt that badly, and she scrambled to her feet after a moment, intent on finishing her conversation with Bellamy.

The referee blew the whistle for another timeout on the field. Bellamy was moving towards Roan, ready to retaliate, but Murphy and Miller rushed over and pulled Bellamy back away from Roan, while a couple of Roan’s teammates did the same. No one really seemed to have heard the warning whistle, as they were crowding around each other, yelling taunts at the other team.

Clarke turned her attention back on Bellamy as they were being shuffled away from Roan and Polis’ team, “I don’t know what you think you saw last night, but I promise you that wasn’t me. I wouldn’t betray you like that.”

“I know what I saw,” Bellamy tried to walk away, but he turned around and pointed an accusing finger at her. “Friends don’t do what you did.”

Of all the things Clarke expected, she didn’t expect Raven to run onto the field. Coming up beside Clarke, Raven put her hand on Clarke’s shoulder, “Finn, are you okay?” Clarke could tell she really was just worried and checking to make sure she was fine. Raven had no ulterior motive here.

Clarke wasn’t sure what to say to her without making her position look worse to Bellamy. Bellamy held up his hands in exasperation, “You’re really going to sit there and tell me nothing’s going on between you two now?”

“Nothing happened between me and Raven!” Clarke cried out.

“What about last night?” Raven asked, taken aback. The look of confusion and hurt that played across Raven’s face broke Clarke’s heart. This wasn’t what she wanted. Raven had been her friend, and she was getting in the middle of something that was all Clarke’s fault.

Bellamy gave Clarke a sad but smug look as he shrugged his shoulders and turned to walk away back towards the middle of the field where the other players were congregating to start the game back up again.

Clarke wanted to pull her hair out of her head as she tried to find the words to explain. Short of exposing herself, there really wasn’t any way to get him to listen to her. What did she want more? To win a soccer game or to come clean with Bellamy, her friend who meant a lot to her, and who she might be developing some stronger feelings for?

Opting for the truth rather than more lies, she reached for Bellamy, but he pulled away. “I’ve been lying to you about a lot of things the last few weeks, but I am not lying to you about this. You have to believe me.”

“What are you talking about?” he asked, still angry.

“I’m actually Clarke Griffin, Finn’s cousin,” she told him. It felt good to finally tell him who she was.

He shook his head, “I know Clarke, you’re not her.”

Taking a deep breath, Clarke started from the beginning, “A couple weeks ago, Polis’ girls’ soccer team had been cut, and when they wouldn’t let me join their team, I decided to pretend to be my cousin and go to Arkadia until he got back, which was supposed to be tomorrow. I wanted to get on Arkadia’s soccer team and beat Polis and prove that a girl was just as good if not better than them.”

“What?” Bellamy shook his head, more confused than angry now. It was a lot of information to process.

“But my cousin came back early, and that’s who you saw kissing Raven, and he’s the one that played the first half.”

Reaching up, she took off her wig, the extra hair around her brows, and the sideburns. Her blonde tresses fell down around her shoulders. Running a hand through it, she looked over at Raven, who was staring in horror at her side. “I’m sorry Raven, I never meant to mislead you. By the time I found out your real feelings, it was too late, and I didn’t know how to fix it.”

“So, who did I kiss last night?” she asked, confused.

“That’d be me,” Finn came running up to them and stood opposite Clarke. He was looking anxiously at Raven, wanting desperately for her to like him despite all the craziness that had transpired.

Raven, to her credit seemed less horrified now, but she was still looking dazed. Clarke didn’t blame her, though, as she tried to put herself in Raven’s position. It was all so crazy and a little unbelievable.

With Finn at her side, everyone could see that Clarke was telling the truth, and she now had proof that she hadn’t been the one to betray Bellamy. At least, not last night.

Looking around, Clarke saw Coach Kane was just behind her waiting for them to sort this all out, and he had Coach Shumway behind him, who looked like he had all sorts of things to say about this. She glanced between all her teammates. A few were looking at her as though they were disgusted, some were still confused, some were indifferent, and some were watching anxiously, waiting for Bellamy to say something. Anything.

Turning back to Bellamy, she said, “I’m sorry for lying to you Bellamy, but I never actually thought this plan through. I was just thinking about the game when I went into this. I didn’t think about how this would affect anyone else.”

Bellamy looked Clarke directly in the eyes for several tense seconds before he let out a breath. “It’s like Coach has always said: Some people are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.”

Clarke smiled. It wasn’t exactly what she wanted, but it seemed as though Bellamy was accepting her- didn’t mean he liked her, but it meant he was willing to get through this game. Her smile was short-lived, though, once Shumway started rambling about how girls couldn’t play on a men’s team.

Coach Kane turned and faced Shumway, squaring up to him, calm as a cucumber. He took the rule book out of Shumway’s hands, ripped it in half, and threw it back in Shumway’s face. “Here at Arkadia Academy, we don’t discriminate based on gender, and we’re gonna kick your misogynistic ass.”

Arkadia’s team taunted Shumway in awe at their brazen coach. Clarke wasn’t sure what she thought Kane would do upon her reveal, but she was glad this was the way the events unfolded. Now Shumway would know exactly who it she was when they won today.

* * *

As the game began again, Finn was standing on the sidelines next to Raven, who was looking at the game, but he doubted she was actually watching it. He watched Clarke run up and down the field for a few minutes. He never did understand soccer, as his performance the first half had proven. He thought Clarke was doing well, and Bellamy was finally passing her the ball. Whatever issue had been going on between them seemed to have been settled. At least for the moment.

Finally, Finn couldn’t take the silence any longer. He turned to Raven, “Hey, I just wanted to apologize for this whole thing.”

Raven turned her head sharply and gave him an odd look, “What would you have to apologize for. If anything, you’re the victim in all this.”

Shrugging his shoulders, Finn agreed, “Yeah, but I’m still sorry you were involved in all this. I know this must be confusing at best. I’m still not sure I quite understand everything.”

Raven nodded, “I feel like I should be mad, but Clarke was trying to prove something. She never led me on, and looking back, she had tried to make it clear she wasn’t interested in me that way. I just need some time to adjust to this whole thing.”

“Do we want to talk about that kiss?” Finn asked. “I know I’m not who you thought I was, but if you give me a chance, I’m a nice guy.”

She smiled, “Let me adjust to the fact that the guy I was crushing on is in fact a girl, but I the guy I thought the girl was actually exists. I’ll need some time, but I don’t see why we can’t see how things go after that.”

Finn nodded his head in agreement, “That works for me. Take as much time as you need.”

“Finn!” came a voice, and when Finn turned around, he saw Clarke’s four best friends running towards him.

“Can you explain what is going on out here?” Monroe asked. After a brief synopsis, Monroe nodded and turned to Jasper and Monty, “I told you it wasn’t her.”

Fox agreed, “I told you he sucked too bad to be Clarke- no offense.” She gave him a grimace, as though she had forgotten who she had been talking in front of.

“This has been the most bizarre soccer game I’ve ever been to,” Monty shook his head.

“But it’s been entertaining,” Jasper pointed out.

He wasn’t wrong, Finn agreed.

The crowd suddenly got louder, and they all shifted their attention to the game. Clarke was picking herself up off the ground and was getting in position for the penalty kick. Finn noticed Clarke’s friends were holding each other’s hands as they watched anxiously. Fox had even reached for Raven’s hand, who laced her fingers with hers. Together the six of them watched as Clarke kicked in the game winning goal.

If they thought the crowd had been loud before, it was deafening now. The six of them started cheering and jumping up and down, swinging their arms between them happily. Clarke had done it. She’d really done it.

* * *

Clarke was in disbelief as she was swarmed by her teammates. She barely had time to see Roan fall to his knees in defeat. She had thought she might want to say something to him, but she decided this was her closure. She didn’t need anything else. Glancing over to the other bench, she watched as Shumway threw his clipboard onto the grass angrily. He happened to glance at her, and she smirked at him before turning her back to him. She’d proven her point.

After the players lined up to shake hands, Clarke looked for Coach Kane. He was at the bench, smiling out towards the field. She hurried over to him, “Coach?” When Kane turned to her, she rushed into an apology. “I’m really sorry about having lied to you, but I just wanted to say thank you for giving me the chance to play.”

Kane nodded, “When you transfer over, your spot will be waiting for you.” Then he turned, grabbed his stuff, and headed back into the locker rooms.

Clarke barely had time to process what he had just said when she was bombarded from behind, her friends rushing her. Monroe and Fox hugged her tightly. This had been as much for them as for her, after all. “We’re proud of you,” they told her.

Beaming at them, she said, “Thank you guys so much for being here for this.”

“Like we would have missed this,” Monty shook his head.

“This will be the best story to tell people,” Jasper joked.

Finn and Raven were standing awkwardly to the side, and Clarke went up to them. She looked at Raven, “Would it be weird if I hugged you?”

Raven smiled, “A little, but a hug would be good.”

Clarke pulled Raven into a tight squeeze. “I really am sorry about all of this, but you were the best friend I had at this school. You were the only good thing here for a long time.”

Raven winked at her, “Duh, I’m awesome.”

Clarke couldn’t disagree with her. Turning to Finn, she finally pulled him in for a hug, too. “I’m sorry I sort of stole your identity.”

“Hey, I wasn’t using it here in the states. You might as well have played soccer and had people believing I was actually good at the sport. Just, don’t do it again,” he motioned behind him. “Go.”

She smiled again at him before she took off across the field. Bellamy had been stopped by a few people, so he was just now heading for the locker rooms. She hurried up to him, “Hey, can we talk?”

He turned to her, an unreadable expression on his face. He was silent for several seconds before saying, “I just need some space right now. I need to let this whole day process. We can talk tomorrow, you can come over to the dorms in the morning.”

Clarke nodded her head, “I’ll text you before I’m on my way.” She could respect him wanting some space and a night to sleep on all the information she’d thrown at him.

He nodded his head in understanding and then turned back to head into the dorms.

Her big, dirty secret was out. She didn’t have to hide anything from anyone. For the first time in weeks, she felt free and relieved- a giant weight had been lifted from her shoulders. She was nervous to talk to Bellamy tomorrow, but whatever the outcome, at least she could be honest now. She could make a fresh start; she could start over.

She’d done it.

Clarke Griffin could do anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be one more chapter after this to wrap up everything! Hope you all liked it!   
> I know I thank you all after every chapter, but I really mean it. You guys have been so good to me! I love all your comments! Can't wait to hear what you all think of this chapter!


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has been one wild ride. Thank you all so much for your support and encouragement. I hope you enjoy this last chapter.

When Clarke awoke the next morning, she couldn’t believe she’d actually slept. Trying to fall asleep had been awful. She wasn’t sure how long she laid there, staring at the wall, replaying the day’s events. It had been the most rollercoaster ride of a day she’d probably ever had. 

  
The happiness Clarke felt in her chest whenever she thought of the game winning goal was almost overwhelming. The look on Roan’s face had been priceless, and she was pretty sure she could lay claim to the fact that she’d also made him cry. The feeling was nothing compared to watching Coach Kane stick up for her- to have Coach give her a chance. It was one of the best feelings she’d experienced.

  
On the other side of the coin, the anxiety and dread she felt at having to talk to Bellamy today was quickly casting a shadow over her happy cloud. With time to sleep on the events of the day before, would he be more likely to dismiss her now? Would he think she was crazy and insane? He wouldn’t be wrong, of course, but that didn’t make Clarke feel any better.

  
Sighing, she reached for her phone and glanced at the time. It was only seven. No wonder she didn’t really feel rested. After the game, the team had an after party to celebrate, so Clarke had gone, bringing all of her friends including Raven and Finn. They’d all stayed way too late. It had been a struggle to change out of her clothes the night before.

  
A shower would be the first item on her agenda today, she decided as she got up. She was staying at Monroe’s house, and Monroe’s parents were kind enough to have set up the spare room for her. Grabbing a change of clothes out of her duffel bag, which Finn had packed with all of her stuff from the dorm room.  She really didn’t have a lot with her. How had this been her life for these last few weeks?

  
A shower and teeth brushing later, Clarke was feeling slightly more ready to face the day. When she went downstairs, she found Monroe sitting at the breakfast counter eating some fruit out of a bowl. Plopping down in the stool next to her, Clarke stole a couple grapes for herself.

 

“You need a ride to Arkadia?” Monroe asked.

  
Clarke nodded, “If you don’t mind. I’ve got a lot of people to talk to.”

  
“I don’t mind. I’ve got nothing better to do today anyway. I’ll probably head over to Fox’s while I wait for you. Just text me when you need to be picked back up,” Monroe told her. “But first, let’s go get coffee and donuts. We need something substantial before you tackle the day.”

  
Unable to argue with that logic, Clarke agreed, and the two of them drove to a little bakery down the corner. Now that she’d had some caffeine and some sugar in her system, she felt as though she could think more clearly. Before they left, Clarke ran back up to the counter and bought a couple bakery items, which she put into three separate bags. Then she asked for three iced coffees and called it good. 

  
Bellamy wasn’t the only person she was going to check in on today. He wasn’t the only person she needed to apologize to. She hoped the peace offering would go over well. 

 

Monroe pulled up to the school and dropped Clarke off. “Call me if you need anything,” she told her before driving off.   


Taking a deep breath, Clarke turned around and looked out at Arkadia, her home for the last couple weeks. It felt weird to be walking on campus as a girl in the open. As she passed some early morning students, she kept her head down. The whole school probably knew what she had done, but Clarke hoped they wouldn’t be able to recognize her. 

  
Heading to the girl’s dorm first, Clarke decided Emori would be her first stop. Shuffling the bags and the drinks into one hand, she knocked on the door and waited. When Emori opened the door, she looked confused. “Can I help you?”    
“Your roommate isn’t back, yet, right? Can we talk?” Clarke asked. 

  
Stepping aside, Emori motioned for Clarke to enter and shut the door behind them. Unsure of whether to sit or stand, she waited for Emori to offer her a chair. She didn’t; she just sat on her bed and looked at Clarke expectantly.   
“It’s me, Finn, the guy you let crash here last night. Except I’m really Clarke,” Clarke looked at her sheepishly, waiting for some sort of backlash. 

  
“I kind of knew it,” Emori nodded her head, seeming to be unimpressed by Clarke’s revelation. “Obviously, I didn’t know your real name, but I knew you were really a girl.” She almost seemed bored with this information.

  
Frowning, Clarke couldn’t help but ask, “How long have you known? And what gave me away?”

  
Emori shrugged, “I can’t say for sure, but I knew after that double date we went on. I mean, I always sort of suspected there was something different about you; you seemed to understand women better than any guy does. But after the double date, I saw you scratching your head, and I could tell your hair was a wig. Then I realized how feminine your features really were, and everything just clicked.”

  
“Huh,” Clarke wasn’t sure what to say to that. “Well, I’m sorry I tried to lie about it.” She handed Emori one of the bags and one of the iced coffees. “I’ve brought a little something to try and make up for it.”

  
Happily taking the goods, Emori smiled at her, “Thanks. But I’m not mad, so you didn’t need to bribe me with treats.”   
“I felt like I needed to do something,” Clarke told her. “You might not be mad, but Raven and Bellamy are. Why aren’t you mad I lied to you?”

  
Emori gave her a stern look, “Because you had your reasons for doing what you did. I didn’t know you very well, and you didn’t owe me anything. If I was Raven, I’d be mad, though. You knew how she felt and never told her the truth.”   
“To be fair,” Clarke interjected. “I told her a few different times that I wasn’t interested. It wasn’t like I led her on this entire time.”

  
Consenting, Emori nodded in agreement, “That’s fair then. Though, I could see where she must be struggling with this.”   
“Which is why she’s my next stop,” Clarke told her. 

  
Getting to her feet, Emori smiled at Clarke, “Thanks for coming and trying to clear the air between us, but you’ve got bigger fish to worry about.” She led Clarke back to the door, opening it for her. “Thanks for the muffin and coffee.”

  
Clarke returned her smile. “It was the least I could do after everything.” She turned to head back down the hallway.

  
“Hey, Clarke?” Emori called to her, and Clarke paused, turning back around. “Don’t beat yourself up about this. What you did was weird, but you had a reason. Through it all, you seemed to have stayed pretty true to yourself. That’s got to count for something.”

  
“Thanks, Emori,” Clarke’s heart swelled. She hadn’t expected this little pep talk from Emori, but it was a pleasant surprise. “I’ll talk to you later.” After one more smile, Clarke turned around and headed up to the next floor to find Raven’s room.

  
Clarke anticipated her talk with Raven to be harder than her talk with Emori. With Raven, there had been an interesting relationship between the two of them. Clarke had clung to Raven, needing a friend. She never meant for that to be turned into anything more. She could see now how Raven might have thought she was interested. With the whole Bellamy thing, Raven must have thought Clarke was jealous rather than looking out for her. 

  
Sighing, she made herself knock on the door. It took a moment before Raven’s roommate, Harper, answered the door. She didn’t say anything, just narrowed her eyes, which told Clarke Harper knew what had happened. She had probably been at the game to witness everything first hand. And Raven probably had been venting about the whole situation with her.

  
“Is Raven in? I’d like to speak with her,” Clarke tried to look as sincere and humble as she possibly could. 

  
Raven must have heard her voice. Before Harper could say anything, Raven whipped the door open wider. “We can talk,” she told Clarke and exchanged a look with her roommate. Harper nodded and disappeared down the hallway.

  
“I know this can’t even come close to making up for this whole fiasco, but I brought you breakfast,” Clarke said as she set the bags and coffees on Raven’s desk. Grabbing a bag and one of the coffees, she held them out for Raven.

  
Taking the items, Raven took a sip of the coffee. It must have been to her satisfaction because she kept drinking. She made no move to say anything. 

  
Letting out a shaky breath, Clarke decided to just dive in. “Raven, I just wanted to apologize about this whole thing. I really didn’t want to hurt you- or anyone. In my head, I thought I’d come in, take some classes, practice soccer, and win the game against Polis. Then Finn was supposed to come back the same time I left, and the switch would happen seamlessly. Obviously, that didn’t happen.”

  
Raven set the coffee and the bagel down on her desk. “Look, Clarke, I’m not mad. I know I was reading into signs that weren’t really there. I liked you a lot, and I wanted you to like me back. You told me in the beginning that you didn’t see me that way, and I had thought over time that would change. I even understand why you did it, as weird as that may be.” Raven stood up to face Clarke. “But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t still hurt or that I’d need time to deal with all this.”

  
Nodding her head in understanding, Clarke replied, “I know, but I just wanted to make sure you knew how sorry I am that I hurt you, and maybe once you’re able to, I’d like to be friends. For a long time, you were the only person in this entire school who would talk to me.”

  
“This wasn’t as easy as you thought, huh?” Raven asked with a smile.

  
“Not even close,” Clarke shook her head.

  
“I’m glad you won the game against Polis. After seeing that coach, I can see why you wanted this so badly,” Raven replied. She sat back down on the edge of the bed, reaching for her bagel. 

  
“Thanks. It says a lot about you, Raven, that you’re able to be this objective with me. I know this isn’t easy, and I hurt you, and you must be really confused. It means a lot to me,” Clarke confessed. 

  
Raven nodded. “It is a little weird that the guy I’ve been crushing on hard is an actual girl. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Just not what I was expecting,” Raven shrugged. “I’ll be fine. Just going to take the weekend to decompress.”   
Clarke’s lips pulled up into a half smile. “You’re an amazing person, Raven Reyes. Even though all of this is screwed up, I’m really glad I met you.”

  
Raven held Clarke’s gaze. “I know I’m awesome but thank you for reminding me. Thanks for the bagel and coffee. Definitely earned yourself some brownie points.”

  
“Ya, but not with your roommate. I should have brought some for her, too. You know, bribe her to like me with goods,” Clarke joked. 

  
Raven shrugged, “She’ll be fine. She’s just protective of me. If I start liking you again, she’ll like you again, too. She’s one of my best friends. She’ll understand when I explain it to her.”

  
“Thanks, Raven.” Raven was truly remarkable. Clarke half expected her to wake up angrier than yesterday and start throwing things at Clarke when she came over. “Can I hug you? This feels like a good hug moment. But only if you’re okay with it. I don’t want to make things weirder. But maybe I’m making it weirder by asking and rambling about it for this long.”

  
“Definitely stop talking,” Raven laughed as she got up and pulled Clarke in for a big hug. “We’re good, Clarke Griffon. You have my number. Give me the weekend, but then text me anytime you want to hang out.”

  
Clarke wanted to cry. “I will.”

  
“Now, go talk to Bellamy,” Raven told her, with a head nod towards the door. 

  
Nodding her head, Clarke smiled before grabbing her things and leaving with one final wave goodbye. Things were still going really well so far this morning. Much better than the scenarios she had thought up the night before. In her head, she imagined Raven throwing objects at her, maybe even refusing to see her.

  
As she stepped back out into the grounds between the girls’ and boys’ dorms, she took a deep breath and let herself relish in the moment. She’d walked out of both rooms with new friends. Even if things went really south with Bellamy, she could still feel good that she’d made friends with Emori and Raven. The sun’s rays shown down on her throu gh the trees, a slight breeze rustled the leaves. The campus was quiet. It was Saturday morning. No one wanted to be out, yet. 

  
Turning to the boys’ dorm, she wished she could put this off. Clarke Griffin was anything but a coward however. She steeled herself and made her way up to her old room. Finn answered the door after she knocked. He smiled at her as he motioned her inside the room. He excused himself and closed the door behind him, leaving Clarke to stand awkwardly in the middle of the room staring at the floor while Bellamy sat at his desk hunched over a textbook. 

  
How could be so handsome in a flannel pajama bottoms and a bulky sweatshirt? He was wearing his glasses, which he didn’t like to wear very often. His dark hair hung in wild curls over his forehead as though he hadn’t bothered to do anything with it after waking up. 

  
He turned after several moments to face her. Instead of saying anything, he stared at her, taking her in. It was as though he was seeing her for the first time, and he was taking measure. It wasn’t that far off. Everything he thought he knew about her was all distorted now. 

  
She thrust out the bag and the coffee. “I brought these for you,” she said, handing them off to him. He took them, which had to be a good sign, right?

  
“Thanks,” he said as he peeked into the bag and pulled out the donut before taking a bite. “It’s good. My favorite.”

  
“I know,” Clarke admitted. “That’s why I got it.” She let herself glance around the room, to take in her temporary home.  Nothing had changed since the last time she’d been in the room. Finn was much less tidy than she was, so his stuff was strewn on the floor in front of his closet, his bed unmade. “Look, Bellamy, before we say anything else. I just want to say that I’m sorry for everything. I never wanted to lie to you or to deceive you. I was as honest as I could be in the situation.”

  
Bellamy seemed to think over her words. “You know, I knew you were hiding something. I just assumed you were trans. So, I didn’t say anything because that was fine, and I figured if you wanted me to know, you’d tell me.”

  
Surprised, Clarke was at a loss for words. “I never thought that I might be perceived that way. I know I’m not really trans, but I appreciate the fact that you had my back like that.”

  
Bellamy shrugged as though it wasn’t a big deal. Maybe it wasn’t to him, but it was to her.

  
“How do you feel about this whole thing now that you’ve had some time to think it all over? What can I do to convince you I had the best intentions?” Clarke asked a bit desperately. 

  
Sighing, Bellamy answered, “Honestly, I don’t even know.” He ran his hand through his hair as he leaned back in his chair. “Like, I understand why you did it. Roan and Shumway are tools, and I’m glad we won yesterday to throw that crap back in their faces. It’s just. Everything I thought I knew about you is a lie.”

  
Shaking her head furiously, Clarke said, “That’s not true. I’m still the same person you talked to late into the night. I’m still just as awkward as a girl, I assure you. I do come from a rich family, who want me to act more lady-like. Other than who I really was, I didn’t lie to you.”

  
Bellamy looked like he was going to say something, opening his mouth to do so, but then he shut it, and stared intently at his textbook.

  
“Bellamy, I’m still the same person you could talk to so easily, the same person you can go play soccer with, the same person who would wingman you if needed. I have always had your back, and I always will,” she pleaded with him, begged him to understand.

  
“You’re right. It’s just weird,” Bellamy admitted, still not looking at her.

  
She debated what to say next. As long as she was doing a full disclosure, she felt she needed to just say it. “I also want to say that I really like you, Bellamy, and I know it might be weird, considering the circumstances, but I was wondering if this whole ordeal has changed your feelings for me?” Unsure of what to do with her hands, she clutched them tightly in front of her, hoping he still liked her in the same way.

  
Turning to look at her, Bellamy tilted his head to the right and considered her. Clarke forced herself to stay quiet and not fill the silence. Bellamy needed time to sort out his feelings, and her pressuring him wouldn’t help. 

  
“Is it screwed up if I said I still like you, too?” Bellamy asked after several moments, letting out a breath that sounded almost like a laugh.

  
“I think I’ve filled the quota for screwed up,” Clarke told him.

  
“That’s actually very true,” Bellamy agreed. He hesitated and then stood up. “Now that I’ve had time to think of this, I actually get it. It’s still really weird. And I’d appreciate a heads up going forward if you decide to do something like this again.”

  
“Absolutely,” Clarke nodded her head vigorously. “You’ll be the first person I tell if I decide I need to infiltrate another school.”   
“That’s all I ask,” Bellamy smiled before leaning down, hovering just above her lips, waiting for her to make the move to go to him. She did, eagerly pushing up into him. 

  
Clarke had been craving kissing Bellamy ever since the carnival. A part of her had wondered if she’d just made the kiss out to be better than it was in her head. That was not the case. Bellamy sucked on her bottom lip, using a little teeth when she had to pull away and get her bearings. He was a good kisser, a dangerous kisser. She wanted more. 

  
“So, I know this is super last minute, but there’s the big ball thing for us debutantes to enter high society tonight. Would you be my date?” she asked. “If you don’t already have a tux, that’s okay. You can come in sweatpants for all I care, though my mom might have a fit if she saw that. But that’d be fun to see, too.”

  
“Hey,” Bellamy interrupted her by placing his forefinger under her chin and making her look up at him. “I have a tux, and I’ll be there.”

  
Clarke let out a sigh of relief, “Really?” 

  
Bellamy nodded before kissing her again, briefly this time. “Really.”

  
“Then I need to get back to Polis. I promised my mom I’d be back home today,” Clarke said, though she made no motion to move.

  
“Does she know about this whole fiasco?” he asked curiously.

  
Shaking her head, Clarke answered, “Nope. And I’m hoping to keep it that way. She thought I was staying with Finn’s family. I’m sure it’ll come out eventually when she asks them about it, but I’ll deal with that then.”

  
Laughing lightly, Bellamy leaned his forehead into hers. “You’re an interesting person, Clarke Griffin, you know that?”

  
“You’ll definitely never be bored with me,” Clarke assured him. After another kiss, Clarke pulled back, “I better get going. This went much better than expected.”

  
“What? Did you expect me to yell and throw things?” he asked good naturedly.

  
“Sort of, yeah,” she nodded. “And I wouldn’t have blamed you if you had.”

  
“If I’d have known about it, I probably would have supported you. I’m always for punching the patriarchy in the face,” Bellamy assured her.

  
“That seems to be the common theme,” Clarke told him. “I stopped to talk with Raven and Emori before I saw you.”   
“How is Raven?” he asked.

  
“Still trying to process everything, but good. I’m sorry about the whole Raven thing. That couldn’t have been easy to deal with.” Clarke grabbed her phone out of her pocket and sent a quick text to Monroe to come pick her up.

  
“Thanks. I knew all along she was using me, but I had hoped that a date would have changed her mind. Once we were there, though, I knew we weren’t compatible. It was disappointing, but it just made me realize that I really do like you, Clarke. So, it was probably a blessing in disguise.”

  
Clarke leaned back up for another long, deep kiss. She’d kiss Bellamy all day if she could. Getting lost in his arms and snuggling in bed definitely sounded better than going back to Polis or even the Debutante ball, but Clarke was responsible. She’d made a deal with her mother that she knew she needed to keep. She let herself get lost in the kiss for another few moments and finally pulled away, chest heaving with excitement and being a tad out of breath. 

  
“I’ll see you tonight?” Clarke asked, she needed to be reassured.

  
“See you tonight,” he agreed. 

  
With one more peck on the lips, Clarke turned and left the dorm room before she lost her nerve and decided to stay there all day. That idea sounded much much better than going home and getting ready for the ball and putting on some frilly dress her mother had picked out for her. 

  
When she got to the passenger pick up area at the beginning of campus, she turned around to take in the campus. She’d spent such a short time here, but it had felt like a lifetime. This had truly been a life changing experience for her. She wasn’t really sure how going back to Polis would feel, but she knew it would be a weird adjustment. Clarke was up to the challenge, though. 

  
Thankfully, she’d made some friends here, so she knew she’d be back. It didn’t feel so much like goodbye; it felt similar to a ‘see you later’. 

  
Monroe pulled up, and Clarke saw Fox, Monty, and Jasper in the back seat, all of them smiling and waving at her happily. She’d truly gotten the lucky lottery ticket in friends. They’d practically gone to hell and back together in the last few weeks. She got into the car and high fived everyone before Monroe drove off. 

  
Clarke knew life wasn’t like the movies with happily ever afters, but today felt pretty close.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, thank you all so so much for reading this story and loving it as much as I have loved writing it. Your comments and kudos and subscriptions were much appreciated and made writing the next chapter so much easier. 
> 
> Now that this is done, I'm wondering if there would be an interest if I did a Bellarke version of other RomComs. Like 'How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days' or something. If you think I should and have any suggestions, please send them my way!

**Author's Note:**

> If you'd like me to continue, please let me know!  
> I'd love to hear your thoughts on this story!  
> Thanks for reading!


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